


Unexpected Circumstances

by nobinaries



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-13
Updated: 2017-10-13
Packaged: 2019-01-16 21:27:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 39,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12350961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nobinaries/pseuds/nobinaries
Summary: The team travels to solve a case that hits too close to home for both JJ and Emily, but it also opens new pathways for them to find each other.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this story involves discussion of homophobic violence, as it is structured like an episode of the show it deals with some of the darkness of humanity. 
> 
> This story was started back in 2008 and this story takes place in that time frame of the show. So JJ is still press liaison and there has yet to be any southern detectives, and in my world there won't be. I never finished it because IRL sort of fell apart but I recently revisited the story and decided to finish it. Hope you enjoy.

_Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, and don't put up with people that are reckless with yours._

_-Kurt Vonnegut_

JJ’s office reflected an environment of organized chaos.  Folders were stacked: those that needed to be reviewed, those that had been reviewed and rejected, those that required attention, cases to be passed off, or cases to be taken by the BAU.  If she allowed herself time to contemplate it, the power of the position she held would be nearly overwhelming.  That’s probably why she never really allowed herself time to think about it.  The choices she made in this office impacted the lives not only of the team, but the victims, their families, their entire communities.  If she allowed those thoughts to cross her mind it would impede her ability to make extremely important decisions.  

She would be fooling herself to say that those decisions didn’t wear on her from time to time.  Lately the job had been getting to her, maybe it was just the fact that they were getting closer to the holidays.  All of the bows and bright lights were in such sharp contrast to the horrors they dealt with on a regular basis.  It was difficult to have faith in the human spirit and in the spirit of giving when you faced the worst side of humanity every day.  There was a great deal of evil in the world and some days the weight of that was heavier than JJ wanted to admit.

Especially as she looked at the file currently open in front of her.  Four women had been killed, shot execution style in the back of the head while on their knees.  Lives snuffed out too soon.  She had prepared her brief for the team but knew this one was going to be more difficult to deliver than usual.  There were aspects of the case that hit closer to home than JJ could admit, but she had made an art of covering up parts of herself in her professional life.  With one last look at the file she gathered up the papers and stood, ready to prepare the team to face another unsub.

__________

The team was already assembled in the briefing room.  Reid and Morgan were seated at the table reviewing the files in front of them, Hotch and Rossi were exchanging notes on a recently closed case, which left Emily Prentiss by herself leaning back in her chair fixing JJ with her intense gaze as soon as the blond entered the room.  JJ expertly covered the momentary jolt she always felt when she met those fathomless eyes, refusing to give the slightest outward hint of the impact they had on her.  

Emily continued to watch JJ as she moved to the front of the room, feeling the familiar pang of longing she had been storing in a decidedly JJ shaped compartment in her consciousness.  Since joining the team Emily had been attracted to JJ.  Her dedication to the victims, her emotional investment, her openness; all impressed the dark-haired agent.  JJ was able to employ her emotions in a way Emily had long ago been taught was far too dangerous.  At the same time Emily was well aware of the many things that stood between them and the simple reality that her longing would always remain just that.  

JJ turned to the board behind her, taking a last look at the faces of the victims before turning to face her team, her family, to send them after the person who brought all of those lives to an end.  She took a deep breath, steeling herself to deliver the story to them.  She felt the clinical way in which she told them that each woman had been bound and forced to kneel as they were shot in the back of the head, fighting to keep the emotion out of her voice as she gave the descriptions of the victims.  As she continued to speak she could sense herself separating from the words, struggling to keep the reality of why these women were targeted from touching that carefully hidden part of her identity.           

As she spoke she found herself trying to make eye contact with Emily, she couldn’t really explain why but somehow knowing the other woman was hearing these words made them a bit easier to deliver.  She just hoped that it wasn’t obvious she was looking for comfort when she met those dark eyes.  JJ couldn’t describe the sensation she felt as the connection was made, it was as though for a brief moment the tattered edges of her emotions were soothed and she could say the words that had been caught in her throat.  As an inexplicable, and incongruous considering the circumstances, feeling of safety blossomed within her, JJ was able to inform the team that there was fear these killings were hate crimes.

Emily saw JJ seek out her eyes as she delivered the news that they may be looking for a homophobe with a homicidal streak.  She couldn’t help but wonder why JJ looked at her like that.  It seemed as though there was some message in the look that was meant only for Emily, a secret communication that was just out of the dark-haired agent’s grasp.  Though she couldn’t quite read the message, she accepted the feelings it inspired and opened up her gaze enough to offer the solace that it seemed JJ needed and Emily was more than happy to provide.  Emily had no illusion about their relationship possibilities but she was not willing to deny JJ the friendship she seemed to need in this moment.

JJ continued to go over the cold facts of the case, privately drawing strength from Emily’s presence.  “The local police haven’t been able to find a connection between the victims other than their sexual orientation.  None of them were particularly visible or active in the gay community. The first and third victims were regulars at one of the local bars but the other two may never have even gone there if the bartender’s memories can be trusted.  There is no professional, dating, shopping, or social connection common to all four victims.  Each victim was reported missing three to four days before their bodies were found.”

“What about local hate groups?”  Morgan spoke up knowing the briefing was now transitioning into initial brainstorming.

“The Portland PD hasn’t been able to turn up any connections.  Their investigation has been focused on local hate groups but they continue to come up empty,” JJ responded, she also knew that these killings were turning into a PR nightmare for the police and they wanted to make it clear they were trying to close this case by calling in the big guns.

“Well then, wheels up in twenty minutes, let’s go,” Hotch effectively called the briefing to a close knowing they had a long flight ahead of them to discuss what they knew and didn’t know about the case.


	2. Chapter 2

The familiar confines of the BAU’s jet always gave JJ a unique sense of comfort.  Flying with her team as they discussed initial victimology and started the first steps of profiling an unsub coupled with the forward motion of the plane always made her feel as though they were moving steadily toward their goal, in contrast to the briefing room where they all seemed to give off energy as though they were itching to get to work.  She tried to settle in, forcing her own issues to the back of her mind and focusing on the task at hand.

They were seated about the cabin in their usual way.  Reid was in the back corner at the table, file closed in front of him as his memory wouldn’t require him to open it again. Morgan sat across the table from him, Emily in a seat by the window but her attention focused inside the cabin.  Hotch occupied the bench seat so he could see the entire team. Rossi, who was still finding his place after so many years away, was sitting on the arm of a chair.  JJ seated herself across from Hotch, whether subconsciously or not, because it offered her the best view of Emily while still allowing her to be fully engaged in the conversation.

“Each of the victims was found within twelve hours of her death,” Reid spoke up. “The bodies were dumped near well-traveled areas in a large waterfront city park.”

Emily finished Reid’s thought, “The unsub must be local and well acquainted with the area to leave bodies in such easily spotted areas without being caught dumping them.”

“All of the victims were reported missing so we know he is keeping them somewhere for at least a couple of days before killing them, so he must have a home or somewhere to keep them separate from others,” Hotch added.

“Erin Michaels, the first victim, was missing for the longest time before her body was discovered.  He kept her for an additional day before she was killed, that could indicate he was perfecting his system.” Emily was having a hard time going over the details of this one; it was taking all of her compartmentalizing skills not to throw something.  She even found that JJ’s normally comforting presence just added to her frustration as though this unsub and all he symbolized was what kept the two of them apart. Expertly she wrapped her emotions in a tight bundle and tucked them away imagining she could keep them that way.

“There has been no evidence of sexual assault in any of the cases,” Reid pointed out, “and there doesn’t seem to be a sexual component to the murders.  The unsub also doesn’t seem to want to be seen by his victims when he kills them, it’s possible the unsub feels some level of remorse for the killings.”

“That may explain why he drops the bodies in such a conspicuous place. He may want to make sure the bodies are discovered quickly,” Hotch added.

“The murders were well executed and organized,” Morgan observed. “This guy is focused and prepared, well able to continue doing this for some time.”

“That’s why we will make sure he doesn’t,” Hotch commented as though it was a foregone conclusion.  “When we land Morgan and Reid will visit the sites the bodies were found, see if you can get a feel for the area.  JJ, call your media contacts and take a look at what sort of coverage this has already gotten.  Rossi and I will get things set up with the local PD and Emily you can begin contacting those closest to the victims; their families, their friends, whoever reported them missing.  We need to see if there are any connections that have been overlooked.  Morgan and JJ, once we’ve sorted out the initial information check in with Emily and see where she is with the interviews.”


	3. Chapter 3

Emily was beginning to feel a frustrated lack of progress.  So far, she was half-way through her interviews and had yet to uncover any new findings.  It was as though her subjects were trying out for a play, and the police reports were their script.  Other than adding more haunted faces of partners and family members to her mental scrapbook of tragedy, her conversations had accomplished very little.  She hoped her next interview would be more fruitful as she knocked on the door of the brother of their first victim.

“Mr. Michaels, I’m Emily Prentiss with the FBI,” she held up her badge for his inspection.  “We are investigating the murder of your sister and three other women.  If you have a few minutes I have some questions.”

Gregory Michaels was an unassuming looking young man with slightly shaggy sandy blond hair and remarkably average features.  The kind of person you passed a million times on the street and promptly forgot the moment they had left your line of vision.  He paused only a moment before opening the screen door.  “Of course Agent Prentiss, come in, though I don’t really know what information I can give you.   My sister and I did not spend much time together.”

“Any information you have may be helpful, sometimes it is the most insignificant detail that breaks a case,” Emily passed the young man and entered his living room.  As she noticed the family pictures on the end table a subtle unease crept into the hollow of her stomach.  Trying to shake the feeling that she wished JJ or Morgan had called her to regroup prior to arriving at Gregory Michaels’ doorstep Emily returned her focus to the victim’s brother.

 “You were the one who reported your sister missing, isn’t that correct?” Emily began, turning to face him.

“Yes, but those were my mother’s wishes.  She became alarmed when Erin failed to come to Sunday dinner and, as her son, it was my duty to ease her worries.  I had little interest in Erin’s physical being and saw no reason to panic over her whereabouts.  Mother’s always had a soft-spot for my sister.”  Adjusting a photograph of his mother on the mantle, Gregory added, “I had far more concern for her immortal soul.  Please, have a seat,” he said motioning to a nearby chair.

Emily veiled her interest and surprise at his last statement as she lowered herself into the offered chair.  “Had your sister done something to endanger her immortal soul?”  This wasn’t the line of questioning she had anticipated but she was following her instincts. 

 “God will not be mocked, Ms. Prentiss,” he responded, moving to a chair across from the FBI agent, “and my sister had chosen a path that led her far from God, but you are investigating her murder so you already know that.”  Gregory was now directly in front of her and Emily watched his expression as he continued.  “I can safely assume from your question that you do not agree with my assertion that my sister was a sinner but I assure you her life was an affront to God’s order,” there was a conviction in his voice that established reasoned debate would no more sway his opinion than wind moves a mountain.

“Be that as it may, her killer should still be brought to justice and it is my job to see to it that happens so any information you have on your sister’s activities would be appreciated.” Emily had to hold herself in check as she spoke, this guy was starting to make her twitch.

“Justice comes for all of us in due time as it came for my sister,” he paused rising from his own seat, “may I offer you a glass of water Agent Prentiss?”

Emily accepted, if only to steal a moment to pull it together before she hauled off and punched this pompous ass in the face.  Though she had dealt with ignorance on many occasions it was always difficult when it put on such a normal and reasonable face.  Gregory Michaels spoke with a rational tone, without particular passion or anger; in his world what he said made perfect sense.  In Emily’s world, however, his words spelled an environment of hate and intolerance she’d had to live with for far too long.  She found herself distracted by a new level of empathy for these victims.

All too soon Gregory had returned with two glasses of ice water on a tray that he placed on the coffee table between them.  “I understand my views are not popular in today’s praise of ethical and spiritual ambiguity but being on the side of right is not always popular,” he continued, returning to his seat across from her.  “Don’t misunderstand me Agent Prentiss, I loved my sister and I prayed for her soul.  I prayed for Erin to turn her back to the darkness within her and her dying with that mark upon her soul is my greatest failure.”  His eyes darkened with an unidentifiable emotion.  “My sister’s damnation does not rest solely on her own shoulders; I bear a portion of that burden.”

“In what way,” Emily took a drink from her water glass in an attempt to keep her face as impassive as possible.  “The killer surely brought an abrupt end to your attempts to save your sister.  I would think they assume that burden, not you.”

“My attempts, as you call them, should have been more successful than they were, and yet the grip of darkness remained stronger than I was,” his voice took on an aspect of grief that had been lacking up to now, “I lost her and I will carry that with me always.”

The conversation was suddenly interrupted by the shrill sound of Emily’s cell phone.  “I apologize, if you could excuse me for a moment,” she stood and walked toward the kitchen to answer the call.

“Prentiss,” she kept her voice controlled not allowing the warmth she felt at seeing the caller ID enter her tone.

“Emily, it’s JJ.  I’ve finished up here, need a hand?”

Something about being in a house with the very definition of holier-than-thou made Emily want to answer that question in a decidedly inappropriate manner but she reined in her rebellious side as quickly as it had appeared.  “Yes, I could definitely use some help.  I’m just finishing up here but I’ll text you the next address and we can meet there in fifteen.”

“Sure thing,” JJ had a hard time keeping the note of happiness out of her voice, it was so incongruous with what the afternoon held in store for them she wasn’t even sure why it was there.  More and more she found herself refusing to examine the emotions she felt when she was around Emily.  It was just so much easier to ignore them particularly considering whenever she did decide to look more closely at them all she could see was an exercise in futility.  JJ shook the thoughts out of her head as she flipped open her phone to find the address Emily had sent.


	4. Chapter 4

Emily took an extra moment while texting JJ to steel her resolve before she went back to finishing up this interview.  She needed to take some deep breaths and actively remind herself that regardless of this guy’s beliefs he had recently lost his sister to a violent end.  It was important that she focus on that aspect over everything else because she knew if she didn’t she was likely to end up facing some sort of disciplinary action for beating the crap out of him.

Calm and collected Emily re-entered the living room where Gregory Michaels sat sipping his ice water and seeming intently focused on the family photos on the table. She took this moment to observe him unnoticed.  So much of profiling was in the tiny minutiae of people’s lives.  Not just their personalities but their surroundings; what they displayed, what they didn’t display, how they arranged things. Her gaze traveled to the pictures; they seemed to all be of his mother except for the largest one in the center that featured an intensely stern looking man that she could only assume was his father.

“I apologize again for the interruption, Mr. Michaels.”  Emily was employing her best professional yet sympathetic tone.  With what seemed like a great deal of effort he took his eyes off the pictures and stood turning to face Emily as she continued to speak.  “If you think of anything else that might be helpful please don’t hesitate to call.”  She produced a business card from the inside pocket of her suit jacket and handed it to him.

“I doubt I will have anything to provide, but I’m sure if something comes up you will be hearing from me.” It was obvious by his tone that he was as finished with this interview as Emily was.  They politely shook hands in that quick perfunctory way that makes it obvious neither party wanted to have any sort of prolonged contact.  

Immediately upon closing the door behind her Emily unclipped her cell and dialed Garcia as she headed to her SUV. The feeling in her gut as she left Gregory Michaels’ house was too intense to ignore. It may just be his bigotry getting under her skin but it could be something more. Either way she had to look into it.

“You have reached the Goddess of all Things place your offering on the altar and your question shall be answered,” Garcia’s voice came over the line.

“Hey, Garcia,” there was always something  _happy_ about talking to Garcia in nearly any circumstance.  Emily thought maybe it was the image of pink fuzzy pens and tiaras that accompanied her in the mind’s eye.  “I need some information.”

“You have come to the right place my dear.  Whatcha need?”  As she spoke the tech goddess wheeled her chair into position to find the necessary information as soon as she was given the go-ahead.

“Anything you can find about Gregory Michaels.  He’s the brother of the first victim Erin Michaels.  Something about him makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up.”  Emily knew if there were any skeletons in that closet Garcia would find them.  Though she still had a vague feeling of lingering unease she did feel slightly better as she climbed into the driver’s seat and closed the door.  Putting something solid and mobile between her and Gregory Michaels seemed like an excellent idea.

“All will be yours, I’ll let you know when I have something,” Garcia’s fingers were already flying across the keyboard.  This was always the moment she waited for, she may not be a profiler but she knew full well, as did the rest of the team, they couldn’t do the job without her.

“Excellent.  Talk to you soon, thanks, Garcia.”  Emily hung up the phone and pulled out into the street.  As she began to drive she turned her thoughts to the next interview.  She knew it would be an entirely different sort of emotional ordeal than the last one but somewhere within her she knew it would be easier.  The rational part of her mind that she was so accustomed to dealing with would be able to sort through the grief and pain for clues.  The emotional part of her would remain safely untouched.  Except for the part that would draw solace from the presence of a certain blond agent, but Emily didn’t think about that part.  That compartment remained safely and quietly unacknowledged.


	5. Chapter 5

JJ sat behind the wheel of the obligatory black SUV waiting for Emily.  She looked up the street thinking this particular vehicle couldn’t possibly stand out more in this neighborhood.  She had squeezed into a parking spot between a Prius and a Subaru that looked like it hadn’t seen the better side of 100,000 miles in a decade.  She found the whole FBI image fascinating and wondered what the profiles would say about a group that spent so much energy on cultivating an image of strength and mystery yet drove vehicles that were so obviously overcompensating for something.

Besides, contemplating cars while she waited guaranteed she would not start entertaining ideas of things that she really shouldn’t be thinking about.  Maybe it was just this case and her own frustrated emotions but her mind kept conjuring up images of Emily any time JJ gave herself an idle moment.  Or maybe JJ had just been single for way too long.  She hadn’t been in a serious relationship since college and had barely had a real date in longer than the blond agent even wanted to contemplate.  Lately it seemed that she wasn’t even that interested in dating, she had plenty of fun on girl’s night out with Emily and Garcia.  Besides the last time a woman had hit on her JJ had found herself thinking that, of all things, her eyes were the wrong color; sort of a greenish hazel not unpleasant just not – JJ jumped half out of her skin at the knock on the passenger side window and then forgot her surprise as she met deep brown eyes.

JJ rolled down the passenger side window and Emily crossed her arms on the edge of the door and leaned in slightly.  “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” she said as a soft smile touched her dark lips.

“No, it’s fine.  I should have been paying more attention,” JJ said not wanting to dwell on where her thoughts had been traveling with Emily this close by.  “So, anything I should know before we start?”

“We are headed to the second house from the corner.  Jesse Aldridge is the partner of the most recent victim, Lisa McKinna.  According to the police report she reported her missing when she didn’t come home from work. The police traced her steps and determined Lisa was abducted after getting off at her usual train stop about eight blocks from here.”  As she finished speaking she leaned back out of the window, allowing JJ to roll it back up and exit the car.  Emily didn’t embellish the facts from the report. It was too easy to focus on the fact that this woman had been so close to home in her own neighborhood where she felt safe and relaxed all of which probably made it easier for the unsub to catch her unawares.  

JJ came around the front of the SUV and the two of them walked in silence toward the house.  This interview was going to be difficult and both of them knew it.  As they walked JJ had to suppress the impulse to reach out and take Emily’s hand to give and perhaps gain some comfort from the touch.  They had held hands precisely one time; while they waited in the hospital after Garcia had been shot.  JJ could still remember the feeling of peace that had flooded through her as the warm strength of Emily’s hand had settled into hers.  In a part of herself JJ rarely allowed to surface she longed to feel that again.  

In moments when the physical space between them was so minimal Emily always marveled that the feeling of not touching JJ was almost as intense as the feeling of touching her was.  There was a part of her that knew how natural it would feel to slip her hand into JJ’s as they walked.  She remembered all too vividly how it felt to have the other woman’s delicate yet remarkably strong hand firmly in her own.  Luckily that train of thought was derailed by their arrival at the doorstep of the house.


	6. Chapter 6

JJ and Emily sat in comfortable chairs listening to Jesse tell the story of the last days of her partner’s life.  To the untrained eye she seemed to be holding up extremely well but neither agent had an untrained eye.  The tension in her shoulders was obvious in the way she held herself and there was a redness around her eyes that no amount of cosmetics could entirely cover.  Her voice had the monotone quality of total exhaustion that the two women had only ever heard come from someone who had just experienced true heartbreak.

“It was a pretty normal day actually.  We went out for coffee together before work.  I never really thought the last thing we would share together would be Starbucks, ya know.”  Jesse’s voice faded with the last words as she seemed to drift back into her memories.

Emily listened to the words while taking in the surroundings at the same time.  It was obvious this house had been occupied by people who had built a happy life together.  It still had that well lived in feel that sadness hadn’t touched yet.  Emily wondered to herself what it must have been like here a few short weeks ago, what it would feel like to fill a home with love.  Her living space had always had an air of efficiency to it that wasn’t about home but about convenience and functionality.  Yes, her apartment had a beautiful view but it was just an apartment.  

JJ broke into Emily’s thoughts with a question.  “I’m sure the police have already asked but did you or Lisa know any of the other women who were killed?”

“I’ve wracked my brain trying to think if the names were at all familiar but they just aren’t.  I don’t understand this.  I don’t understand at all.  She was so close, she was almost home.”  Jesse broke down with those words tears running down her cheeks that she didn’t bother to wipe away as though she had become accustomed to their presence.  

JJ stood and walked over to where Jesse was seated to kneel in front of her placing a comforting hand over the other woman’s where it rested on the arm of the chair.  “There is no way to make sense of this.  I’m so sorry for your loss and I promise you…I promise you…we will stop this guy.  You have my word.”  There was a fire in JJ’s eyes and as she spoke it was clear that she meant every word.  If she had any say in the matter her team would not stop until she had found justice for these women.  JJ couldn’t accept anything else.  Not for them and certainly not for herself.  

Emily had never seen JJ quite like this.  JJ always showed dedication and an ability to invest in cases that awed Emily, but this, this was different.  There was a light in those intensely blue eyes that seemed to at once darken and brighten their color.  Emily found herself wondering what it was about this case that was affecting the blond this way.  At the same time, she didn’t want to wonder too much.  Almost any of the ways the questions that entered Emily’s mind could be answered were either too frightening or too overwhelming to remain solidly compartmentalized.  And if Emily couldn’t keep a rein on them she didn’t want them at all.  Not now, and maybe not ever.

That thought alone caused an unexpected pain in the dark-haired agent’s chest.  She couldn’t identify if the pain was loss or regret or something altogether different.  She did, even in that moment, acknowledge that much of the feeling was caused by her own fear and cowardice.  She had been trained to control her emotions and if she couldn’t she simply wouldn’t allow herself to feel them.  Any other option was messy and ended in broken hearts.  The pain of never knowing was easier than the pain of losing, it was that simple.  Emily brought her thoughts to an abrupt halt before she could get too far lost in them.  These thoughts were not going to get them anywhere on this case and were too dangerous to continue so she tucked them away hopefully never to see the light of day again.

“What Agent Jareau means is we will make every effort to solve this case,” Emily needed to take some of the emotional charge out of the air.  She hoped using less loaded language would help with that.  She wasn’t trying to contradict what JJ had said she just needed to bring this situation back into a balance she understood.

JJ’s eyes flashed anger as she looked up at Emily.  She was in no place to be placated by such language and she was willing to bet Jesse was not either.  It was all she could do not to tear into Emily right there in the grieving woman’s living room.  JJ was fully aware this case had gotten behind her professional façade but standing in this room feeling the press of the loss suffered here made her too angry to care much about such trivial things.

“We will get this guy,” JJ reiterated as she stood.  “Thank you for taking time to talk to us.  I know this couldn’t have been easy for you.  If you think of anything, anything at all, please don’t hesitate to call.” As she spoke JJ handed her card to Jesse.  She gave the woman’s hand a reassuring squeeze then headed for the door with no further words.

Emily felt the awkward tension grow between them as she gave her condolences to Jesse and followed JJ out the door.  As soon as the door closed behind them and they stepped out on the porch Emily opened her mouth to try and speak but was cut off by a furious blond.

“I don’t need you to translate for me Emily,” lighting flashed in JJ’s eyes, “I meant what I said in there.  If I have any say in this we will not leave until this case is solved.  Period.”  She didn’t know why she was so angry with Emily.  Or rather she did know, but there was no way she was going to go there.  There was a part of her that wanted Emily to be as angry as she was because if that were true maybe so many more of JJ’s most secret desires could also be true.

“JJ,” Emily put her hands up in a sign of surrender, “I wasn’t trying to put words in your mouth.  I was just trying to defuse the situation.”  She didn’t know what to say to JJ to make her understand.  The reasons she had spoken were not at all related to the job or even the interview and there was no way Emily was going to try and explain the emotional upheaval that threatened her whenever she saw JJ upset.  All Emily could think was how much this well and truly sucked.

“You can’t defuse honesty, Emily.  No matter how much you want to take the emotion out of every situation it’s not always possible.  Unlike you I can’t keep my emotions in neat little compartments.”  JJ flung the words out of her mouth with the force of all the frustration and anger she had been feeling since this case landed on her desk.  Even as she spoke she could feel the conflict within her threaten to boil over.  She was caught between knowing none of this was Emily’s fault and her nearly overwhelming need to unleash her anger and frustration.

“Well I suggest you give it a shot because we still have three interviews left and I need your head in this Jareau,” Emily fired back.  “If you can’t keep your emotions in check then I don’t need you.  Now I suggest you get in your car and try and pull yourself together before we get to the next one.”  With that Emily turned on her heel and headed down the block to her own vehicle.  She didn’t know why she was sure JJ would follow, but she was.  She was also sure this fight wasn’t over; she just hoped she could put it off, indefinitely.


	7. Chapter 7

JJ’s knuckles were white as she gripped the steering wheel trying to slow her breathing and loosen the tight coil of anger that still sat in her stomach.  She had known from the moment she had opened the file for this case that it would be difficult to keep her distance from it.  What she hadn’t anticipated was the complex swirl of emotions it would inspire.  This wasn’t just about her sexuality or her choices it had somehow become more intrinsically about  _her_.  She saw these women’s lives, all that had been lost at the hands of some hateful man, and somehow it was changing her, forcing her to reshape her world view.  She had expected to be afraid, to have all of her reasons for keeping herself hidden to be affirmed.  She was wrong.  It wasn’t making her afraid, it was making her angry.  Her fingers flexed on the wheel again and she glanced into her rearview mirror to see if Emily had pulled into the street yet.

Emily leaned her head back against the seat and allowed her eyes to close for a moment.  She hated feeling this jumbled.  Internal chaos made her feel like she was losing her grip on reality.  Emily had learned at her mother’s knee how to swallow her emotions.  She was well practiced, accomplished even, at putting the right face to the world.  She never let the façade crack, she had thought her walls were, by now, impenetrable.  Yet, somehow parts of her were bleeding together.  She had thought her feelings for JJ were tightly contained, separate from their friendship and most certainly separate from work.  She had thought her choices about her personal life had long since been put to rest and yet the more time she spent on this case the more that old conflict rose within her.  Emily’s life did not need more complications and this case seemed to be teeming with them.  She shook her head as if to rid it of these counterproductive musings, started the car and pulled out into the street.

When she reached the corner, Emily stopped and made sure JJ was following her.  She was certain that by the time they arrived at the next interview JJ would pull off composed and polite but the ease of their typical interaction would be gone.  Emily was almost surprised at the small stab of pain she felt at that knowledge, almost but not quite.  It seemed the more she tried to resist the complications that kept trying to insinuate themselves into her universe the worse they became.  Emily needed to get out from under these feelings and she needed to do it fast.  She also needed to get her relationship with JJ back on an even keel before things went from bad to worse.  The key problem was she had no idea how to accomplish either task.

As they wove through traffic JJ focused her vision on Emily’s SUV trying to rid her mind of all the troublesome thoughts that continued to plague her.  The heat of her anger had cooled somewhat but the sharp edges of its forcefulness still bit into her consciousness.  She knew that her feelings had little to do with the words they had thrown at each other; the fight itself had been about something altogether different.  JJ refused to attempt to identify the something, however.  Anger was easier, cleaner, safer for her.  It helped her to focus and as long as she turned that focus outward she would make it to the end of this case.  She kept telling herself that there would be time after this was done to figure out the rest of it.  The problem was the little nagging voice that kept reminding her that this case alone was proof you didn’t always have time.


	8. Chapter 8

They made it through the remaining interviews without coming to blows but that was the best either of them could say about the day.  Emily felt exceedingly frustrated with the outcome of the interviews she had conducted.  She had truly hoped that they would have been able to discover some hidden connection, some piece of information that had been overlooked and the fact that they hadn’t just made this whole situation worse.  The only thing of interest that had turned up was Gregory Michaels and he had certainly not improved Emily’s mood.

She and JJ had arrived back at the police station to regroup with the rest of the team.  It would have been impossible for a group of professional profilers not to notice the tension in the air between the two women but it seemed they were all studiously ignoring it.  Morgan and Reid chose to begin briefing the team on the little information they had gained, focusing on the business at hand and choosing to follow the rule to not profile each other.

“We didn’t really come across anything surprising,” Morgan began.  “Each of the bodies was left within a short distance of relatively secluded parking areas so it seems fairly obvious he transported the bodies, probably in a truck or a van.  The lack of evidence around the bodies indicates he killed them elsewhere.”

“Most all of which we already knew,” JJ interjected, letting a bit of her frustration read in her voice.  

“True, but at least now we know for sure,” Morgan knew they were all feeling stuck but he felt the need to try and point out some sort of vague silver lining in what otherwise felt like a wasted day.

JJ didn’t respond, she just crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair trying not to let her anger play across her expressive features.  She knew if she didn’t keep herself in check she was going to be in for one of those lectures from Hotch about becoming just invested enough without becoming overly involved.  She was fairly certain that if he said anything to her she would probably tell him to fuck off.  A response she knew would not exactly prove her case.

“So, Emily, did you uncover anything?”  Hotch asked in his imperturbable way that in no way indicated his feelings about their remarkable lack of progress.  He could feel the taut emotions in his team; it was part of what made him a good leader.  He also knew there was something else going on with JJ but for now he wasn’t going to push it.  This case seemed to be affecting both Emily and JJ in ways he’d never seen before. But, unless it started to affect their work he wasn’t going to put himself in the middle of it.

“Not much,” unlike Hotch a rare note of frustration slipped into Emily’s answer, “for the most part no one gave us anything we couldn’t have gotten from the reports.  I do have Garcia checking up on the brother of our first victim. My interview with him wasn’t exactly what I expected.”

“Do you think we should be looking at him for this?” Morgan wasted no time getting right to the point.

“It is definitely possible.  His religious convictions were extreme but until I hear back from Garcia there’s no concrete reason to suspect him.”  Emily left out the details of her vague sense of unease she had felt around him.  She wanted some facts to back up her hunch before she sent the team on some sort of wild goose chase.  Almost as if on cue Emily’s cell phone chirped to life.

“You have excellent timing.”  Emily was extremely glad Garcia had called when she did.  This would at least give them some new information to go through and would hopefully lead to something.

“Hey girlfriend, sorry it took me so long to get back to you.  I dug into all the black shadowy corners of this guy’s life.  I’m sending the file to you right now.”  Garcia spoke with her usual enthusiasm.  Her voice always conveyed a sense of satisfaction when she felt like she’d found the good stuff.  “I don’t know if he’s your guy but he sounds like a creep.”

“Thanks, Garcia.  I’ll let you know if we find anything that needs a deeper look.”  

“No problem, keep me posted.” Garcia ended the call with a press of her fuzzy pink pen to the nearby phone and focused her attention back on the screens before her.

Emily reattached her phone to her hip and turned to the team.  “Garcia is sending everything she could find on Gregory Michaels.  His religious perspective definitely puts him in the possible category and the way he spoke about his sister makes me think there’s something going on there.”  Emily sat herself at the conference table, pulled one of their laptops in front of her and began opening the files Garcia had sent.  The team quietly assembled around her reading over her shoulder hoping something would pop off the screen.  Morgan and Hotch stood directly behind her, Reid leaned in from the left and Rossi lurked to the right.  Emily couldn’t help but make the mental note that usually in this situation JJ would be leaning in close over her shoulder but her presence was conspicuously absent.  The blond had placed herself next to Reid, keeping the young doctor between them.

Under more normal circumstances the blond knew she would be using this as an excuse to lean in and enjoy a moment of closeness to Emily even with the entire team there.  She had become practiced at taking advantage of seemingly innocent moments of letting a touch on the shoulder linger just a second too long, of picking the spot closest to Emily when the group was together.  It was now almost habit, something she did without even thinking.  Her anger had not burned away entirely and her feelings toward Emily were just too convoluted and too close to the surface for her to pull off innocent right now and she had no desire to deal with anything else. She wanted the information Garcia had sent, but for now at least she had to create some distance in order to look at it clearly.

Reid, not surprisingly, spoke up first, “Well, you were correct about his feelings toward homosexuality.  He seems to have made little effort toward hiding them.”  Garcia had unearthed several blogs on the topic that Michaels had posted to various political message boards.  He hadn’t even made an effort to cloak his identity the way many did online.  He had even attached his email address to allow ‘concerned’ family members to contact him.  It also seemed he belonged to several discussion groups that dealt with the topic of ‘curing’ gays and lesbians.

“He made little effort to hide his opinions in person and he knew I was investigating his sister’s murder.  I can’t imagine he would seek anonymity online.  It would seem more likely he would actively seek out those who agreed with him.  He wasn’t seeking validation for his beliefs from me, he already has that.”  The wheels in Emily’s mind were turning trying to make connections between her conversation with the man and all of the electronic data in front of her.  It was all they had to go on and by now Emily had a low-level hum of desperation in her head telling her to solve this case and move on.

“Is there anything in his writing that would indicate violence?”  Rossi spoke up in his direct manner.  He had a tendency to cut right through the potential of long discussion to the heart of what they were trying to get at.

“His writing seemed to be based solely in biblical inspiration,” Reid having such ease of recollection answered first.  “He does speak of God’s justice and God’s wrath but it seems to be divine punishment rather than human.”

“At least his rhetoric is consistent,” Emily could hear the words he had said to her repeating in her head.  It was no less troublesome on replay than it had been the first time.  The sound of his voice in her head still made her skin crawl, it was a most unpleasant sensation but there was still nothing that linked him with the victims, other than his sister, and that link seemed strictly biological.

JJ’s voice echoed her thoughts as the blond spoke. “Is there anything about this guy that actually links him to any of the victims except his sister?  I’d hate to see us waste our time on him just because his political views are repugnant.”  

Emily looked away from the computer to try and make eye contact with JJ.  She needed the other woman to see the conviction in her eyes.  As she turned in her chair and attempted to pin JJ with her gaze it became apparent the other agent was actively avoiding that connection.  After another failed attempt Emily let a small sigh escape her lips.  She hoped the noise would be covered by her movements as even that small indicator of her internal struggle made her feel far too vulnerable.

“It’s not as though we have a lot of other options right now.”  Emily realized too late that she probably sounded defensive.  There were more words that sat on her tongue but she was fairly certain none of them would be extremely helpful.  She didn’t want her earlier conflict with JJ to come back to the surface here in front of the whole team.  There was no reason for either of them to still feel this way but logic and reality seemed at odds with each other in this situation.

“Emily is right.” Hotch spoke up, effectively cutting off any response JJ may have had.  “Right now, this is the best lead we have.  I’ll get the files Garcia sent printed out and we can all look at them with fresh eyes tomorrow.  We should all head back to the hotel and get some food and rest.”

JJ wanted to argue that they shouldn’t be resting until the case was solved but she knew he was right.  If they stayed here working until the wee hours it would just feel like pounding their heads against the wall.  Maybe a meal and a shower would help clear her head.  She grabbed her coat from the back of a chair and shrugged it on.  As she did so she noticed Emily mirroring her motion and felt a stab of longing.  She wanted to ask Emily if she wanted to grab food with her, something they had done what seemed like hundreds of times in various cities but it seemed all the simplicity had fled their relationship.  JJ felt frozen between what she so desperately needed and what she couldn’t have as she watched Emily make a hasty exit.  Seeing Emily disappear around the corner JJ knew she couldn’t just keep letting this happen, it was too much.  

With that thought she left the others still getting themselves together and caught up with Emily in the hall.  She noticed that Emily didn’t break her stride or slow at JJ’s approach.  If anything was going to happen it was clear meeting each other half way wasn’t on the agenda.  JJ knew she was going to have to go out on the limb here.  JJ also knew she didn’t really have a choice.

“Hey Em, you wanna grab a bite?”  Her voice sounded just the tiniest bit desperate but she hoped the emotion would pass undetected.

Emily stopped abruptly on her way to the door at the sound of JJ’s voice.  There was a large part of her that wanted to say no, that didn’t want to risk spending time with the blond agent.  A larger part of her, however, was overcome with relief that the other woman had asked.  It meant that maybe they could deal with each other, maybe they could get through whatever it was that had had them at each other’s throats earlier and had threatened to resurface here at the briefing.  Emily knew it was dangerous to say yes but she didn’t think any other choice would be safe either.  That being the case, there was really only one thing to say.

“Sure,” Emily hoped her voice didn’t reflect too much of her inner turmoil, “maybe we should have Garcia find us a place to eat.”  

JJ felt a bit of the twist that had settled into her stomach hours before ease as her offer was accepted.  She didn’t know if dinner was a good idea or not.   In fact, part of her was terrified at the prospect, but somehow even with all that had happened the idea of spending time with Emily made JJ feel infinitely better than the idea of spending the rest of the night alone.  And this way at least she would get the opportunity to try and apologize for their earlier fight.  JJ just hoped she could do that without getting into why she had gotten so angry in the first place.  


	9. Chapter 9

“Garcia, it’s JJ,” having the tech goddess a phone call away was better than a call to information any day.

“Hey girl, what can I do ya for?” Garcia had long ago learned to adapt her schedule to take into account the time differences between Quantico and wherever the team was at a given moment.

“Nothing too critical, Emily and I are looking for dinner,” JJ couldn’t help but let a smile creep onto her lips, talking with her friend always helped her feel better, even if it was only a few words.

“And you, of course, were lost without me.”  As she spoke Garcia began typing, “so what are you in the mood for?  Since you are on the west coast I’m thinking sushi.”

“That sounds perfect,” JJ knew both she and Emily shared eclectic food tastes.

“I am sending you a list of the top sushi restaurants around your current location as we speak.  You may offer all worship to the goddess.”  

“Thank you, Garcia, you are better than Google,” JJ was feeling better by the minute she could feel the days' worth of tension and anger easing in minute steps.  The world was still a dark place and they all had evil and darkness to deal with before this was over but in this brief moment things were looking a little better.

“You bet your ass I am,” Garcia’s smile could be heard over the phone.  “Have a good night, talk to you tomorrow.”

“So, you up for sushi?”  JJ turned to Emily as she hung up her phone and accessed the message Garcia had sent.

“Sounds great,” Emily was glad to see JJ smile for the first time that evening.  “I’ll drive, you just tell me where to go.”

“Perfect,” with that JJ and Emily climbed in either side of the waiting SUV. 

___________________

The ride to the restaurant had been relatively uneventful.  The conversation had consisted primarily of trying to traverse the seemingly excessive number of one-way streets and still arrive at their intended location.  JJ was exceedingly grateful for the need for directions and the relatively short distance they had to travel.  Such realities allowed the air between them to be filled with utilitarian chatter with no room for real conversation.  JJ kept hoping that at any moment she would be struck by a lightning bolt of inspiration and suddenly all the right words would fall gracefully from her tongue.  As Emily maneuvered the SUV into a parking spot, it became increasingly obvious divine intervention was not going to happen.

Garcia’s taste in restaurants had proven, once again, to be fantastic.  The décor and lighting were subtle, warm colors and clean lines.  The crowd was fairly sparse allowing JJ and Emily to get a table quickly.  JJ still had no clear idea what sort of conversation to have with Emily.  She also knew that in a very few minutes there would be no more stalling and this dinner would become painfully awkward if she didn’t come up with something by the time their waiter brought the tea.

Emily was fully aware they were soon going to be faced with just the stretch of table between them, no more convenient and useful things to focus on.  It would be her, and JJ, and the warm golden light that cast a glow around the other woman that Emily found decidedly distracting.  She couldn’t bring herself to make direct eye contact; she was so terrified that if she did all of the things she kept under such tight control would be read there.  For as long as she could remember Emily Prentiss had been able to present herself as whatever anyone wanted her to be.  Presenting the appropriate face to the world was second nature to her and yet there was something about those piercing blue eyes that made Emily fear they would see right through her.

JJ could feel the silence stretching out between them, the sound of it was almost deafening.  She could also read the obvious signs of fear in the woman across the table from her.  Emily’s dark eyes were cast downward to take in the patterns of wood in the tabletop, her hands were wrapped around the ceramic cup of green tea the waiter had placed in front of her but it seemed it was more to give herself something to do rather than any actual desire to drink the contents.  JJ could read all the signs of avoidance, of anxiousness, and she knew with certainty if the silence was going to break it was up to her to do it.  Tamping the fear in her own heart down JJ reached a tentative hand across the chasm for the second time that night.

Small strong fingers came to rest on Emily’s slender, pale wrist.  “I’m sorry.”

Emily’s dark head shot up at the words making eye contact with JJ for the first time since they had been seated.  There was something so sincere and open in that deep blue gaze Emily could feel herself falling into it.  The heat that radiated from the spot JJ’s hand rested seemed to be spreading up Emily’s arm and the warmth of their joined gazes seemed to be spreading downward.  It made no sense, this feeling of combustibility that built within the dark-haired agent.  She opened her mouth to try and speak, to perhaps vent some of her internal pressure, but JJ’s soft voice continued, keeping Emily silent.

“Em, I know how difficult today has been,” JJ was trying to select her words in such a way to mend the rift that seemed to have formed between them today and still skirt the edges of her own secrets.  “In fact, it has well and truly sucked,” a soft chuckle escaped at the words.

“Yes, it certainly has,” Emily let a small smile appear at once glad to be sitting here with JJ.  It would seem that in all the confusion and tumult she had lost touch with the simple fact that JJ was, above all else, her friend.  At that thought some of the tension that had taken up residence in her neck and shoulders seemed to loosen.  Somewhere within her heart Emily decided not to resist the comfort contact with JJ brought, it was just too difficult.

JJ’s fingers tightened almost imperceptibly on Emily’s wrist a move meant to reassure both of them of the reality of the touch.  JJ could sense the change in Emily’s demeanor and felt a rush of happiness as the dark-haired woman visibly relaxed for the first time in what felt like days.

“Let’s make a deal,” JJ let some of the new happiness she felt enter her voice.   “For the rest of the evening no work talk.”  They both needed a break.  JJ knew her emotions were far too close to the surface.  She also knew that if Emily was allowing even the slightest bit of her emotional struggle to be visible the reality of it must be nearly overwhelming.  

“You are officially a genius,” Emily didn’t think she could possibly be more grateful to JJ for that suggestion.  There was no better way Emily could think of spending the rest of the evening than in conversation with JJ over what promised to be excellent food.  If she had spent more time thinking about it the whole situation would probably be surprising.  That was probably why she didn’t allow herself to think about it.  There was no reason to dwell on exactly why sharing this intimate moment with JJ seemed the least emotionally complicated choice she could make, not when just doing so was so damned inviting.

A wide smile spread across JJ’s lips at Emily’s reaction to her suggestion.  This evening was shaping up to be far better than anything about the day had indicated.  Indeed, this was turning out better than anything had in a while, and it only got better when Emily returned JJ’s smile.  The blond swore she actually felt her heart skip at the sight of those perfect red lips turning up at the corners and the glint that flashed from those dark eyes.  Emily was beautiful when she smiled.

JJ could feel her thoughts turning down a dangerous road but was rescued by the arrival of their waiter.  It was only when he moved to place their appetizer in the middle of the table that she realized her hand was still resting quite comfortably on Emily’s wrist.  With a slightly embarrassed chuckle JJ removed her hand, surprised at the tiny ache she felt at losing the contact.  

Emily’s skin felt cold where JJ’s hand had been and she wished for some excuse to draw her back.  The mildly self-deprecating note in JJ’s laughter caught Emily’s attention and she lifted her gaze from the table to search for any clue as to what might have caused that sound.  Emily couldn’t recall JJ ever looking nervous or embarrassed and yet the pink tint that colored her cheeks was unmistakable.  As was the way her eyes were cast downward and the hand that had so recently been against Emily’s skin was tucking a stray lock of blond hair behind her ear.

With little thought Emily reached her own hand across the table, careful to avoid the plates the waiter had just deposited in the center and slipped her hand into JJ’s where it had come to rest.  She gave a gentle squeeze trying to communicate as simply as she could that there was no reason for the blond to be embarrassed; that the comforting touch had been welcome.  As she did so she caught the faintest note of surprise flash in JJ’s eyes, that and something else that Emily couldn’t quite identify.

The heat flushing JJ’s cheeks deepened as she felt Emily’s hand slide so effortlessly into hers, and this time not from the feeling of being caught with her hand in the cookie jar.  She was a tiny bit shocked at the contact and at the feelings such an innocent touch inspired in her.  It was such a sudden response she knew she had not been able to cover it entirely, she could tell some of it must be reading in her eyes.  Though JJ was skilled at presenting a cool professional façade she knew that if you really looked, her eyes eventually gave her away.

“This smells amazing,” JJ grabbed onto the first thing she could think to say, hoping to stop those intelligent brown eyes from seeing things they shouldn’t.


	10. Chapter 10

It took Emily the barest second to grasp what JJ was talking about. She had been so intent on unraveling the mystery in those blue eyes she had almost forgotten about the food.  But now that she was reminded she had to agree the scent of ginger and garlic wafting from the gyoza and edamame they had ordered was delicious.  And, she reminded herself, dinner had only just begun; she had plenty of time to figure out what JJ was trying so hard to hide.

Emily gave JJ’s hand one last reassuring squeeze before letting go and reaching for her chopsticks.  She delicately plucked one of the dumplings from the plate and dipped it in the nearby sauce.  As she lifted it to her mouth she noticed a drop of liquid threatening to fall to the table.  With no conscious thought she caught the drip on her tongue before popping the tasty morsel in her mouth and letting out a small sound of approval.

JJ’s own food seemed frozen midway from the plate.  She clicked her mouth shut with almost audible force in an attempt not to be caught openly gaping.  JJ told herself this was ridiculous, Emily was just eating.  But there was something about that tongue and that hedonistic sound of pleasure, tiny as it may have been, that caused JJ’s blood to warm and thicken.  With what seemed a herculean effort, JJ finally allowed her hand to move toward her mouth.  She barely registered the flavor of her food as lost as she was in Emily’s enjoyment.

“These are really fantastic,” Emily commented trying to get the non-work conversation started.  

“Yeah,” JJ fished in her head for something articulate to say.  All she could seem to come up with was a relatively embarrassing story from her youth.  She supposed it was better than nothing, and definitely better than wow Emily you certainly look sexy eating Japanese dumplings.  Besides relaying this story might help snap her mind out of the feedback loop of Emily’s tongue. “They do remind me of my first trip to a sushi place though.”

“I sense a story coming on,” Emily grinned at JJ encouraging her to continue. 

“You would be right,” JJ matched Emily’s grin.  “So, I was a freshman in college and some friends and I were going out and they wanted sushi.  Needless to say, there weren’t a lot of sushi places in East Allegheny so I was pretty unfamiliar with it but I felt like I was up for the adventure.  When the tray of sushi arrived it all looked amazing, if unidentifiable.  The only word on the menu I had recognized was avocado so I knew that was in there somewhere and I spied a green bit on the plate.”

“Oh no, you didn’t,” laughter lit Emily’s voice as she spoke.

“Oh, but I did, popped the entire piece of wasabi in my mouth.  I was pretty sure I was going to die.  It has only been in the last couple of years I’ve been able to touch the stuff and even now only in very small bits.  No spicy rolls for me, I have some sort of sushi PTSD.”

“Oh my God, that must have been awful,” Emily cringed a little at the thought of that much hot spice all at once.

“It was.  I turned about eighty shades of red and I’m fairly sure I cried.  My friends never let me live it down.”  JJ shook her head laughing at the old memory.  It truly felt wonderful to be sitting at this table with Emily.  She looked across the table and was captured by the soft smile and even softer eyes that greeted her.  It was a rare moment when Emily looked so open and JJ relished the opportunity to read all she could in the warmth of her friend’s face.

Emily was fully aware of the appraisal in JJ’s gaze and she returned it with equal measure.  Her curiosity was still poking at her as she tried to figure out what it was she’d seen in JJ’s eyes.  It had flashed quick and bright like lightning as soon as their hands had come into contact.  Part of her tried to argue that it was coincidence but she was too much of a profiler to believe in coincidences.  It seemed the longer they sat at the table the more obvious it became that they had both been making some rather disastrous assumptions.  

“I’m surprised you ever set foot in a sushi place again,” Emily stated casually breaking the silence before it had stretched too far.

“Honestly, I am too.  But I’ve always been one to get back on the horse.  Besides, that would be like admitting defeat and it takes more than that to bring me down.”  With that JJ popped a piece of gyoza in her mouth and chewed with relish as though to prove her point.

“Yes, it does,” an unexpected emotion wrapped itself in Emily’s simple words.  JJ had often shown strength and determination that humbled and awed Emily in equal measure.   It would seem the bubble of relaxed intimacy that had enveloped them had coaxed those feelings into her voice.

JJ felt the words as much as heard them and took a moment to let them wash over her.  She had never noticed that tone in Emily’s voice before and it sent a delicious shiver down her spine.  It also forced a question to form in her mind that, up to now, would have sounded ludicrous.  There was something in the timbre and cadence of Emily’s voice that felt intimate in ways JJ had only ever dreamed of hearing.  This was definitely something that warranted further investigation.

“Alright, now it’s your turn,” a mischievous glint entered JJ’s eyes as she leaned in a bit.

“My turn to what?”  Emily was sure she already knew but wasn’t about to give it up that easily.

“Come on Prentiss, I showed you mine,” JJ’s tone was teasing and undeniably flirtatious.

Emily almost choked.  The image of JJ that immediately broadcast itself across Emily’s mind had nothing to do with sharing embarrassing dining stories.  She couldn’t miss the look of self-satisfaction that crossed JJ’s face at her reaction to the words and promptly decided two could easily play at this game.

“Somehow, Jareau, I’m pretty sure I’d remember that,” a devilish gleam entered Emily’s eyes as she leaned back in her chair letting her words speak for themselves.

“Yeah,” JJ didn’t miss a beat, “you would.” 

 “I have no doubt,” Emily made no effort to quell the wicked grin that appeared on her lips.  She was enjoying the flirtatious tension that was building but knew that in order to keep it going it was important to back off once in a while, if only just a little.  “So, you wanna see mine, huh.  Let’s see, for my most embarrassing Asian restaurant story you have to go way further back than college.”

JJ almost stopped the story with a comment of how she would most definitely like to see Emily’s, well, anything but opted instead for the gift of a little-girl-Emily story.  Insights and windows into Emily Prentiss came few and far between and JJ wasn’t fool enough to let one slip away from her. She leaned in letting her interest broadcast clearly from the depths of her eyes.

“Okay, so I was eleven, twelve maybe and it was one of those rare occasions when we were in the states and my parents decided we should all dine out together.  For whatever reason they chose Chinese, it was one of those places with the dark red décor and dim lighting.  At the table across the aisle from us, trust me this becomes important later, there was a couple having a romantic dinner date.”

“That can’t be good,” JJ encouraged.

“You don’t know the half of it.  When our food arrived, my plate had a ball of sticky rice on it.  This was to be expected.  What I didn’t notice was the serving spoon that was stuck under the ball of rice.  I reached over my plate to grab my glass of water and that’s when it happened.”  Emily paused for dramatic effect, enjoying this story for the first time.

“Oh God,” JJ was already imaging the fate of the ball of rice.

“I watched in horror as my arm came down on the handle of the spoon and the rice launched. The rice ball somehow remained perfectly intact and flew in a glorious arc across the aisle not losing a single sticky white grain until,  _kapow_ , it exploded precisely in between the clasped hands of the couple across the aisle.  There was rice all over them, in their hair, in their tea, on their faces.  If I could have I would have crawled directly under the table and stayed there, forever.  The couple almost hurt themselves laughing.”  

“I can just imagine the Ambassador’s reaction,” JJ couldn’t help but conjure up the image of embarrassed little Emily and her imposing mother looking less than amused.

“Just one of many times I caused her public humiliation as a child,” Emily shrugged off the ever-present reality of parental disapproval.  She, at least, had learned to find the humor in this particular story.

“Well at least the folks splattered in rice thought it was funny,” JJ commented caught between the comic nature of the story and the small note of sadness that was woven into anything involving Emily and her mother.

“They laughed until they cried,” shaking off the thoughts of her mother.  There was no way on God’s green Earth Emily was going to let her mother intrude on this night.  

With the eerily good timing only the best servers seemed to have perfected their waiter returned with a tray of sumptuously prepared and perfectly arranged sashimi.  JJ mentally added five dollars to his tip for the smile his arrival put on Emily’s face.  It was obvious that Emily had no intention of dwelling on the past and JJ was more than happy to agree. Tonight, was about respite and the new and surprising potential of the present.

“This looks amazing; I don’t know where to start.  Unagi, uni, ikura.”  JJ rattled of the names of some of their selections.

“Impressive for someone with sushi trauma,” Emily teased.

“Are you kidding,” JJ laughed.  “I never wanted anything like that to happen again.  I made sure I knew what every word on that menu meant.  I can tell you the difference between sushi, sashimi, maki and I damn sure know the difference between wasabi and avocado.”

“Well in that case you should be the one telling me where to start,” Emily felt a jolt low in her belly as she watched JJ reach out and select the ikura.  She held the morsel lightly between her fingers as she lifted it.  

“I think you should start here,” somewhere between the flirting and the arrival of dinner JJ had decided to stop skirting around the energy between them.  Either she was right about the electricity that had been sizzling between them or she was about to be humiliated.  Either way she’d know for sure and that was more important than anything else.

There was no mistaking JJ’s intention as she leaned across the table offering the first bite to Emily.  There was a long second in which Emily was frozen by the intensity in JJ’s gaze and her own panic.  She had dreamt innumerable variations on this moment but now that it was here she couldn’t quite wrap her brain around it.

“Unless, of course, you don’t want any,” there was no denying the thinly veiled meaning in those words.  Something in the tone snapped Emily out of her haze and she smoothly leaned in to meet JJ halfway.

“Oh, I definitely want some,” Emily breathed out the words, making her meaning abundantly clear.  Her eyes never left JJ’s as she accepted the other woman’s offering, taking it into her mouth, teeth and lips gently brushing the tips of JJ’s fingers.  The combination of the succulent, complex flavors playing across her palate and the look in JJ’s eyes sent waves of pleasure throughout Emily’s body.  Unable and unwilling to quell her body’s response her eyes fluttered shut ever so briefly before she leaned back in her chair savoring hints of salt and sea on her tongue.

JJ could not possibly have prepared herself for the sensations that accompanied feeding Emily that one bite.  From the moment their eyes met and Emily leaned in accepting the offered morsel the world had taken on a hazy quality around the edges.  There was nothing outside of those deep dark eyes and those perfect red lips.  The soft brush of them against JJ’s fingertips had left her feeling a strange combination of numbness and hyper-sensitivity. Her pulse had begun to throb in a powerful, almost painful way.   She tried to find her voice, to say anything, but her words had fled.  

Emily was faced with a shockingly easy choice.  She could follow her erratically beating heart or the ever-present, if suddenly tiny, voice of reason in her head.  She wasn’t even conscious she had reached a decision but it seemed her body and her heart knew precisely where they wanted to go and the rest of her was just along for the ride. This feeling was thrilling and unfamiliar and ever so slightly terrifying.  It was her turn now in the delicate back and forth that had developed between them as the evening progressed.  She reached out selecting a piece of the unagi and held it out for JJ.

“Your turn,” she was surprised at the sound of her own voice, slightly rough around the edges.

JJ’s response was immediate she shifted toward Emily taking the offered bite in her mouth allowing her tongue to delicately brush and linger over Emily’s fingers.  It was excruciating and delicious for both of them.  Neither one was exactly sure how this had begun.   Neither of them had the least desire for it to end.  But they both knew something was going to have to give or they were running the risk of spontaneous combustion.

Emily, as much as she enjoyed her racing pulse and the delicious ache JJ had triggered with the whispered touch of her tongue, knew more words would have to be shared.  Their friendship was too valuable and their job too insane to risk it all for one night.  If the intensity building between them was any indication one night would never be enough, for either of them.  The chance of having more would be well worth the conversation.  Instead of diving in with logical, analytical questions Emily chose a different tack.  She reached her hand out, palm up fingers open and relaxed, an obvious invitation.

JJ welcomed the gesture, returning it by slipping her hand into Emily’s lacing their fingers together.  She didn’t bother to suppress the shiver that raced through her at the contact; at this point it seemed silly to hide her attraction.  Instead she allowed herself to soak up the beauty of the moment and the woman across the table.

“I wasn’t exactly expecting this,” Emily only wished she could somehow be as smooth and polished as she often pretended to be, but she could tell her shy inner dork was going to lead this conversation.

“Yeah, me neither,” JJ wasn’t exactly feeling supremely articulate either, her heart was beating too fast and her head was too light.

“So, how long have you…is this…I mean,” Emily could feel her tongue tripping over words not sure which question to ask or if she really wanted answers. 

“How long have I known I was attracted to women?  Or how long have I been attracted to you?”  JJ felt a certain boldness in the face of how adorably shy and stumbling Emily had become.  She was so used to seeing Emily Prentiss, FBI she couldn’t help but be wooed by this uncertain, almost geeky Emily she’d only ever heard about.

“Both,” Emily shrugged thankful that one of them seemed to be able to form a complete sentence.

“Since soccer camp when I was twelve and since the very first moment I saw you in Hotch’s office.”  Her answer was direct, simple, and completely honest.  “What about you?”

“I went to series of all girls boarding schools, so I don’t really remember a time I didn’t know and since the very first moment I saw you in Hotch’s office.”  Emily smiled across at JJ.  It would seem for members of one of the most elite teams in the FBI at studying human behavior they’d both been missing some serious clues.

“Seems like we’ve both been a little clueless,” JJ’s words mirrored Emily’s thoughts.

“I think, perhaps, you are a mistress of understatement,” Emily smiled moving her eyes from JJ’s sparkling blue to their interlaced fingers.  She couldn’t stop the goofy grin she was sure was on her face at the sight.  She decided it wasn’t even worth the effort to try.  Instead Emily just stared enjoying the contrast between her pale skin and JJ’s more sun kissed tone.

“We’re holding hands,” the words slipped out without Emily even realizing she’d spoken.  

“Very astute observation Agent Prentiss,” JJ teased the other woman.  It felt amazing just sitting here sharing food, conversation, and physical space.  They had both craved the contact for so long, had tried to steal bits and pieces of it whenever they could.  This was entirely different; the openness, the reality of touch had changed everything between them.

“No, I mean we’re…it’s you…and me…and we’re…” words failed and Emily could feel an uncharacteristic blush creeping into her cheeks.

“Holding hands, I get it Em, I really do.”  JJ smiled softly at Emily’s fumbling speech.  Instead of explaining further JJ simply lifted the hand that was tangled with her own and softly pressed her lips to Emily’s knuckles before slowly lowering their joined hands to the table.  As she did so she watched the light blush that had tinted Emily’s cheeks darken sweetly.

Emily felt electric tingles against her flesh where JJ’s lips had been and felt a deepening warmth spread through her body at that brief contact.  The action JJ had taken did nothing to untangle Emily’s tripping tongue but had managed to express, in the simplest terms, what she had been unable to manage with words.

Luckily for them sushi was relatively easy to eat with one hand because they were both still quite hungry and neither of them seemed willing to let the other go.  They continued eating in silence for a time, each enjoying the view across the table.  Eyes were trained on lips, finger tips remembered the soft feeling of tongues and lips, the food was delicious but both women determined that the tastiest bits had been those first bites shared across the table.

“So, what happens next?”  Emily surprised herself with the question.  She hadn’t expected to break the comfortable silence that had settled over them as they ate.  

JJ paused at the words, taking a moment to look at Emily in a gentle but intense appraisal before speaking.  From anyone else the words might have felt presumptuous.  Instead JJ found the question hopeful and spoken with charming trepidation.

“Next tonight, next week, next case?”  JJ knew what she wanted those answers to be but the newness of all this made her want to hear the words from Emily before she put herself out there more than she already had.

“All of the above,” Emily shrugged shyly and realized it was her turn to speak.  She’d been making JJ take the lead all night, it was about time she tried it herself.  “This wasn’t exactly where I expected to end up tonight; here…with you…like this,” Emily squeezed JJ’s hand to emphasize her point.  “But now that I am, we are, I don’t want to be anywhere else.  And I don’t want this night to end but it will and tomorrow we have to go back to work.  Tomorrow do we file this away under perfect but impossible?”

“You think this is perfect?”  JJ’s mind had latched onto that one word and refused to concern itself with all of the others surrounding it.

“The way my hand feels in yours, the way we’ve managed to eat almost an entire meal without once feeling the need to let go, the color of your eyes right now, those things are all perfect; it’s everything else that’s impossible.”  Emily hoped she would be able to say what she was trying to say.  There was plenty of fear mixed with all the other emotions that have been coursing through her this evening.  It was not, however, the most important one.

“Do we need to think about the rest of it yet?”  There was a tiny, almost pleading note in JJ’s voice that seemed to communicate so much more than just the words.  

It was Emily’s turn to regard JJ.  Her dark eyes traveled from their still entwined fingers up her arm to her face lingering briefly over tempting lips allowing herself a moment’s distraction before stopping at the other woman’s open summer blue gaze.  What Emily saw there stole her breath and caused her heart to clutch almost painfully in her chest.  She had imagined, more times than she was willing to admit, what JJ’s eyes would look like filled with passion and emotion.  Her imagination had nothing on the reality.

That look alone made Emily rethink her earlier words.  She was certain that any obstacle, no matter how impossible it seemed, was worth overcoming to be on the receiving end of those feelings written so plainly in blue and gold.  “I think if we are going to continue this conversation it shouldn’t be here.”

“I thought you’d never ask,” JJ didn’t yet know if either of them was brave enough to take the next necessary step but they’d never find out sitting at this table.  She absently motioned to their waiter with her free hand and wondered for a moment how the FBI brass would feel if they found out the BAU’s generous expense account had covered hers and Emily’s first date.


	11. Chapter 11

Once they had paid the bill it had been a quick decision not to drive back to the station for JJ’s car, after all it would be safe there overnight.  Besides, though neither of them said it aloud, the idea of even that much separation seemed too much to contemplate. The silence in the car had a different quality than it had in the restaurant.  Both women could feel the growing nervous energy but neither knew exactly what to do about it.

JJ’s hands sat in her lap feeling oddly empty without Emily’s delicate fingers entwined with her own.  It seemed strange to crave a touch so much when she’d only recently discovered what it felt like.  As much as she tried to contain her thoughts they seemed to keep wandering to what Emily’s hands would feel like elsewhere, which led to thoughts of what her lips would feel like, which let to thoughts that caused JJ to shift uncomfortably in her seat.

Feeling the tension in the silence mounting Emily decided she needed to do something to cut through it, bring back the easy energy they had shared all night.  Unfortunately, she didn’t really know how.  Anything she could think of seemed to fall into the category of too distracting to do while driving.  So, instead, she followed the only instinct that didn’t require pulling over and placed a soft hand on JJ’s leg just above the knee.

“You okay over there?” Emily’s voice sounded shyly curious as she asked the question.

JJ had to fight an audible squeak as Emily’s hand came to rest on her leg.  It took only a moment for the heat from her hand to penetrate the relatively thin layer of fabric between it and JJ’s skin.  It took even less time for that warmth to spread through JJ’s body.  She couldn’t help but think she should, on some level, be surprised at the immediacy of her body’s response but she wasn’t.  Some part of her had been waiting for this since she first laid eyes on the dark-haired agent.  JJ needed to connect with Emily in some way, complete the circuit of energy between them.  The only thing she could think to do was rest her own hand on top of Emily’s both to make sure it stayed there and to satisfy, on some small level, her own desire for contact. 

“I’m pretty sure I’m better than okay,” the words were spoken so softly it wasn’t clear if they were intended to be heard or not.  But the light squeeze Emily felt was clear enough to wash away any lingering worry.

Emily fought to keep her eyes on the road as she navigated the last few turns.  It took monumental amounts of effort not to gaze over at JJ, or let her eyes linger on where her hand rested.  She felt a sensation that bordered on giddiness, an emotion she’d never been prone too.   It wasn’t at all what Emily had expected.  She’d been in relationships before but they had always felt controlled, contained.  The few women she had seriously dated remained safely, neatly removed from any real emotional attachment.  JJ did not fit in Emily’s relationship box, not even close.  No, these feelings had the potential to completely disrupt Emily’s neatly filed life and the truly surprising part was that she didn’t mind.  She would have to be profoundly blind to not see how many things about this were complicated, impossible even, but none of that mattered in the face of the feeling of her hand on JJ’s thigh.

With that thought Emily maneuvered the black SUV into a parking space near the stairwell that lead to their rooms.  As she did so she realized she needed her hand back in order to put the car in park and take the keys out of the ignition.  It occurred to her that she could just let the car idle until it ran out of gas and then she wouldn’t have to surrender the feel of well-toned thigh under her hand.  She couldn’t help but chuckle softly to herself that she had even entertained the idea.

“What’s funny?”  JJ’s amused voice drifted over her.

“The fact that I’d rather let this damn truck run out of gas than take my hand back to turn it off,” as she spoke Emily looked over, finally able to give in to the need to capture JJ’s eyes.  She hadn’t expected to answer the question quite that honestly, but it seemed she was doing a great many unexpected things.

“I’ve got a solution for you,” JJ slipped off her seat belt and leaned closer to Emily as she spoke.  Reaching out her free hand she slid the car into park and smoothly removed the keys. “There see that wasn’t so hard now was it,” she said, her eyes twinkling.

Emily was certain she had completely lost the power to take in oxygen with the close brush of JJ’s body as she straightened back into her seat. Now that the engine was silent and they sat in the dark Emily felt very much like a hormonal, nervous teenager.  The comparison struck her as oddly amusing since she’d never sat in a darkened car wondering who should make the next move as a teenager.  Her youth had been spent dedicated to trying to be what everyone else wanted her to be.  It had trained her to put on many faces and adapt to almost any situation.  As she removed her own seat belt and shifted her weight to one hip so she could turn and look at JJ it became abundantly clear this situation was not one of them.

JJ had turned as well, as best as she could in the confines of the vehicle.  As she shifted she moved Emily’s hand slightly so it now rested on the inside of her knee.  She was mildly shocked at how badly she wanted to just give in to the desire to slide Emily’s hand up the remaining expanse of inner thigh.  The heat in her body was nearly excruciating and she was sure it was broadcasting clearly to the woman across from her.  

“So,” JJ attempted to cover the roughened edges of her voice with a small throat clearing noise.  “What do we do now?”

“That is the question of the hour isn’t it,” Emily didn’t have an answer.  Her body was screaming one very clear thing but her heart and her mind weren’t nearly as certain.  This was a complex situation that was unquestionably new and Emily was sure neither of them wanted to screw up at this early stage.  As she fixed her gaze on JJ’s eyes she was drawn into their darkening depths.  If anything could make her ever vigilant mind take a back seat it was that shade of blue that invited her to fall in and never surface.

For her part, JJ didn’t have an answer either. Or rather she did but she wasn’t sure it was the right one.  Instead of speaking it she let her desire fill her eyes and leaned in closer drawn in by feelings she was unable and unwilling to resist.  JJ had wanted to be this close to Emily for so long there was no way she was going to let any unsubstantiated fear or doubt cloud this moment.  She couldn’t deny her nervousness but seeing a bit of it reflected in the eyes across from her was oddly reassuring.  

The space between them was shrinking as they gave into the gravitational forces conspiring to bring them together.  Since neither of them had been able to articulate what was going to happen the universe seemed to have decided to show them.  Their gazes were locked each woman wanting to capture every emotion, every color that flashed there.  

Emily still seemed unable to breathe properly.  It was as though the very presence of this woman made her light headed.  She reached her free hand to tuck golden hair behind a perfect ear.  Emily desperately needed more contact to ground her in the reality of the moment.  She was amazed at the softness of JJ’s hair as she ran her fingers through silky strands.  In one smooth motion she slipped the lock behind JJ’s ear and let her hand stop there cupping the angle of the other woman’s jaw her thumb brushing the delicate curve of cheek.  That touch collapsed the last of any resistance Emily had and she felt herself leaning forward the last bit of distance almost as though falling.

JJ barely had time to register the sensation of Emily’s strong hand on her flushed cheek before her senses were overtaken by the whisper soft brush of red lips against her own.  There was no urgency, no desperation in the kiss.  It was as though Emily was telling her they had all the time in the world and rushing would waste the beauty of this.  Emily’s lips tasted lightly of the ginger they had eaten and of something more mysterious and sweet that made JJ want to explore.  She returned the gentle touch not yet giving in to her desire to deepen the connection, savoring the map of Emily’s lips against hers, learning the curve and dip of the corners of her mouth.

The subtle motion of their lips was starting a burning ache low in Emily’s gut.  She was torn between the pleasures of soft exploration and needing more.  She knew she wouldn’t be able to resist forever and when she felt an almost silent whimper escape JJ’s throat she lost any hold she had.  The tip of her tongue brushed JJ’s upper lip and the obvious request was answered with open invitation.  Emily’s hand slid further into thick blond hair and pulled JJ closer as their tongues brushed each other.  Liquid fire raced across Emily’s nerve endings as she reveled in her pure desire for the woman in her arms.

She didn’t want to rush but JJ couldn’t contain the sound that those delicate kisses had brought forth and as their kiss deepened she couldn’t find it in herself to regret that moment of weakness.  The softness of their kisses changed into something else entirely as they opened to one another.  JJ’s hand left the spot it had been resting and slid smoothly into the inner curve of Emily’s knee her grip clearly communicating her need. The sweet complex taste that had teased JJ when they first kissed now exploded in her senses.  It was amazing and terminally sexy just like Emily.  JJ willingly lost herself in it.

If it hadn’t been for the heady mixture of tenderness and desire that threatened to drown them there was every chance neither woman would have been willing to give up the other’s lips.  But after long, glorious moments the overwhelming intimacy of the moment drew them apart just enough to acknowledge the intensity in their shared gaze.  They allowed bare inches of space to creep between them as they drew in shaky breaths of air.  As they did so the reality of their location seemed to sink in passed other passion clouded thoughts.

“We’re still in the car,” Emily observed as though she had, until that moment, completely forgotten they were in the parking lot in an official FBI vehicle.

“So it would seem,” JJ’s voice was low with desire and a touch of laughter at their situation.  

Looking into Emily’s eyes JJ tried to steady herself.  Her heart was beating a staccato rhythm in her chest and her body was humming with unspent energy.  Kissing Emily hadn’t been like anything she’d ever experienced and much of her was screaming to return to those lips.  But other parts of her knew they needed to pause before things got out of hand.  JJ took in a deep calming breath trying to focus her mind enough to form coherent thought.

“Wow,” she hadn’t pulled off articulate just yet. 

“Wow,” Emily couldn’t agree more with JJ’s observation.  She could feel so many words filling her throat but none of them seemed ready to come forward.  All she could do was stare at the woman across from her in wonder.  Emily couldn’t quite hide the feeling of amazement that filled her at the realization that something she had dreamt about for so long had finally happened.  She had just kissed Jennifer Jareau.

“So, I really hope this isn’t the part where one of us freaks out and flees the scene,” JJ couldn’t decide if she was trying to lighten the mood or speaking the words to keep herself from doing just that.  The longer they sat and the more she could feel her own emotional and physical response to their kiss the more she could sense what she was risking.  This was not simply desire between them, whatever happened JJ could not deny her heart was on the line.

“No, I’m fairly certain I’ve spent enough time freaking out over you.” Emily almost absently stroked her fingers through JJ’s indescribably soft blond hair as she spoke.  The sound of her own voice was foreign to her ears.  The emotion that was woven there seemed so natural and yet was not something she had ever allowed.  It was as though the walls she had spent a lifetime constructing between her heart and her head had not so much crumbled or cracked but disappeared in a puff of smoke under JJ’s thoughtful gaze and soft touch.

“Well, I’m glad we’ve settled that then,” there was a shakiness in JJ’s voice that she couldn’t quite hide, a combination of nerves, emotion, and quicksilver heat rushing through her veins.  The stroking of Emily’s fingers through her hair was hypnotic and distracting and the sound of her voice struck a chord deep in within JJ’s chest that seemed to resonate throughout her body.  She hadn’t had time to prepare herself for this feeling; all she could do was let it wash over her.

“So, if we aren’t running away…what are we doing?”  Emily wasn’t entirely certain why she asked such a dangerous question.  As she spoke she leaned back slightly still facing JJ but needing to create at least the illusion of distance instead of just giving into the urge to just stop talking and fall back into those lips.

“That’s one hell of a question Prentiss,” JJ grinned wryly.  Her statement was matter-of-fact, more observation than accusation.  “I’m not sure I have an answer.”  It was a simple vulnerable truth that was spoken in a quite tone that conveyed much of JJ’s trepidation.

At the soft sound of JJ’s voice Emily took her slender hand and drew it up toward her.  A soft smile played across Emily’s lips at the gentle teasing in the other woman’s words.  Without much thought she placed light lingering kisses on JJ’s knuckles.  As she did so she looked into JJ’s eyes, a soft gaze through dark lashes.  It was an act meant to reassure them both, remind them of the connection that was building without overwhelming either of them.  She slowly drew her lips away keeping JJ’s hand in hers lacing their fingers together.  There were so many things to say she wasn’t sure where to begin.

Emily was well aware they had to have this conversation, too much depended upon their ability to get along for them to just give into the obvious pull.  Desire burned between them leaving evidence in warm skin under resting hands and roughened edges of normally controlled voices.  Part of her longed to throw caution to the wind and just drag JJ back to her hotel room and lose herself completely in soft curves, exotic tastes, and warm inviting places.  At the same time, she knew that wasn’t what this night had been about, well, at least not the only thing this night had been about.

“I’m not either.  I wasn’t exactly planning this.  I don’t have all the answers but I do know I’ve been waiting a long time to feel…this.”  Emily paused for a moment seeking JJ’s blue gaze to anchor her in the reality of the conversation.  “This evening has been an amazing finish to what could have been a really shitty day.”

“Yeah, it really has,” JJ let a smile spread easily across her lips.  “I don’t want it to end.”  As she spoke JJ leaned her head against the seat attempting to relax in the relative discomfort of the interior of the SUV.

“I don’t either, but…,” Emily let her voice trail off not wanting to put words to her concerns.

“But, this is all very new and we shouldn’t rush into anything.  We are on a case.  We have to be up early and neither of us wants to do anything to jeopardize our focus on stopping this particular unsub.  And the only thing more frightening than getting out of the car and going to our own rooms is getting out of this car and going to the same room.” JJ counted off each statement with a finger on her free hand stating each one with quiet resignation.

“Uh, yeah, that pretty much sums it up.”  Emily couldn’t really add much to the very logical and responsible reasons they should let this night come to a close.  Nor could she deny that the idea going back to a hotel room with JJ was completely terrifying.  “All of those reasons are totally legitimate.  There is one very important fact you left out though.”

“What fact is that?”  JJ lifted her head from the place she had been resting it and looked intently across the car at Emily.

Rather than speak Emily leaned in and captured JJ’s lips once again.  The motion was quick and firm with none of the hesitancy of their previous kisses.  Emily molded their lips together communicating need, desire, longing and a thousand other emotions.  The kiss was equal parts possession and promise and possibility.  She continued to taste and explore until she could feel the heat overtaking her senses, until the last possible moment that any bit of rational thought allowed her to pull back.

There was only the briefest pause, almost imperceptible, between Emily’s lips colliding with JJ’s and her response.  Somewhere in her mind she registered the surprise at the other woman’s boldness but it was noted and dismissed before she bothered to analyze it.  It was far more important to feel the texture of Emily’s lips and memorize the sensations that touch sent coursing through her body.  It would be so easy to become completely lost in kissing Emily, the temptation almost won just as those delectable lips pulled away only far enough to speak.

“One night will never be enough,” Emily’s voice was both breathless and passion deep, “and wherever this is going I don’t want to be in some random hotel room thinking about anything else.”  She hoped her words had communicated her intention. 

It took a moment for the words to develop meaning in JJ’s brain and when they did they seemed to travel with electric heat throughout her body to settle low and warm.  She knew there was a part of her that should have been disappointed at the words and their meaning, disappointed that she would be sleeping alone tonight.  But somehow that wasn’t at all what she felt.  Her body tingled with unspent desire but her heart knew Emily was right.  They had both waited this long, they could wait a little longer.

“Will you at least do me the honor of seeing me safely to my room Agent Prentiss,” JJ held herself teasingly close to Emily’s lips as she spoke, neither of them having felt the need to create more space between them.  As she completed the sentence she felt the soft rush of air that accompanied the chuckle that was Emily’s response.

“It would be my pleasure Agent Jareau,” with those words Emily finally pulled back into her own personal space.  “I’ll meet you outside?”  At the question a slightly shy yet completely endearing grin found its way onto Emily’s lips.

“You bet,” JJ said the words as she freed her hand from Emily’s and reached for the door handle.  She wasn’t surprised to find her fingers trembling slightly as she opened the door, slid out of the seat, and stepped into the parking lot.  Her lips still tingled pleasantly from Emily’s kisses and she could feel the racing of her heart.  She was quite proud of the fact that her knees didn’t buckle as she stood and took a step.

Emily watched JJ exit the SUV wondering if she had just made a very mature decision or the worst mistake of her life.  She knew that if she had chosen a few words differently and she would not be leaving JJ on the doorstep only to enter her own room alone.  But, in the end, she had spoken the truth.  This wasn’t about one night with JJ, this was about tomorrow and the next day and Emily wanted to do this right.  With that thought Emily exited the SUV and locked the doors behind her.    With a smooth, determined stride she met JJ by the side entrance that led through the stairwell to a bank of elevators.

As soon as Emily had arrived at her side JJ reached out and took her hand wanting to remain physically connected for as long as possible.  With her free hand, she took her room key out of her pocket and swiped it to open the outer door.  JJ led the way through the entrance her left hand behind her still securely held in Emily’s.  It was an easy choice to continue down a short way to the elevators rather than up several flights of stairs.

“So, what room are you in?”  JJ felt a little silly trying to make small talk but it was either that or give into the desire that still thrummed through her veins.  It hadn’t occurred to her that morning that room arrangements would matter.  She had fallen into the habit of a thousand nights spent in hotels to swing in, toss her bag on the bed, and turn around to join the team.  At the time, any interest in where Emily slept couldn’t easily be explained away.

“805,” Emily had noticed when they checked in, what now seemed like a lifetime ago, she and JJ had rooms next to each other.  She had not allowed herself to ask why she had noted it; her denial seemed almost funny now, all things considered.

“807, looks like we’re neighbors,” JJ felt a note of nervousness enter her voice suddenly.  For reasons she didn’t want to dwell on she felt like she’d be more comfortable knowing Emily was on another floor, or at least down the hall rather than a mere five inches of drywall and two by fours away.  Thinking of her so close and yet still untouchable added a new level of frustration to JJ’s already agitated senses.

Before Emily could comment the door to the elevator dinged open and they entered still hand in hand.  They turned to face the doors hands easily switching as though they had done it a million times.  As they settled back in Emily reached out and punched the button for the eighth floor and the doors slid shut.  She wasn’t entirely sure she’d be able to let go of JJ’s hand when they finally reached their rooms.  In the past few hours she’d grown quite accustomed to the touch and didn’t want to sacrifice even a moment of it, especially since JJ had started a light stroking motion with her thumb.  Emily tried to steel her resolve with the knowledge that, in her heart, she knew it was the right choice even if her body didn’t agree.

JJ stared absently at the numbers as they progressed higher enjoying the silence and the flow of energy that passed between their joined hands.  There was so much in that simple connection.  JJ hadn’t ever experienced this much feeling from the simple act of holding hands.  Her thumb began slowly rubbing over Emily’s tracing its length learning the texture of skin there.  It was a small thing but as the red numbers ticked by it became the sole focus of JJ’s attention.  She knew it would be difficult, almost impossible, to give up that touch when they reached their rooms.  As the elevator arrived at the eighth floor, the doors slid open, and they stepped out in unison JJ tried to convince herself letting go would, in fact, be the right thing to do.

It was only a few steps down the hall to find the doors to their respective rooms.  Emily stopped between the two doors tugging JJ’s hand and drawing her to a stop.  “Well, here we are.”

At the pull of Emily’s hand JJ turned to face the other woman her free hand, quite of its own volition, reached out and traced a line from shoulder to wrist stopping only when she could take strong pale fingers in her own.  She stared for a moment at their four hands clasped between them enjoying the contrast of Emily’s alabaster skin and the sun-kissed tone of her own flesh.  There seemed to be something so perfect about their hands like this.  JJ slowly drew her gaze up to take in a different contrast of pale skin and dark eyes that had taken her breath away from the first moment she’d laid eyes on Emily.

“Yeah, here we are,” the words slipped from JJ’s lips just above a whisper.

JJ could feel the pull toward Emily in some deep, primal place within her.  She was captured in those dark fathomless eyes and had no desire to escape; she would happily stay there for the rest of her days.  There was something unique about this moment, JJ had never stopped to appreciate the time between first kisses and becoming lovers.  In reality, she’d never let that time linger for very long, it implied a level of involvement that just wasn’t conducive to the rest of her life.  But this moment with Emily was entirely different and entirely worth the investment.  She could feel that irresistible pull again and leaned in closer shortening the gap between them.

Emily was lost in twin seas of blue and the hum of JJ’s voice.  Nothing in her had prepared her for this moment.  She stood on the precipice knowing that at any moment she would willingly fall, willingly risk being crushed on the rocks below, all for this woman.  The blue of JJ’s eyes continued to draw her closer until she could no longer resist the sirens call of soft lips for one last time that night.  As the circuit between them was completed Emily’s hands loosened themselves from JJ’s and slid to the other woman’s hips drawing her closer.

The insistent tug of Emily’s hands on her hips drew JJ in until their bodies pressed firmly together.  The blonde’s hands slid around Emily’s waist in response holding them together, ensuring she could draw out the languorous press of their lips.  She knew that all too soon the contact would be over and she intended to revel in every fleeting moment of it; the soft perfection of Emily’s lips, the sweetness of her tongue, every emotion that was bleeding into the press of them together.

Accessing some hidden reserve of strength Emily slowly drew her lips away from JJ’s.  The ache that the parting left in her body was almost enough to convince her to give in to the pulsing desire that seemed to have taken up permanent residence in her core.  She forcefully reminded her rebellious body that this choice was about the future not about the increasingly demanding present.  She could feel JJ’s breath ghosting over her lips, still moist from their kisses.  She could see the fire in those eyes that she was sure reflected her own.  If they were going to stop, it had to be now.

“Good night, Jennifer,” Emily allowed the syllables of JJ’s full name to roll with lingering passion off her tongue.  “I’ll see you in the morning.”

JJ barely registered any of the words Emily spoke, except for one.  One she had never much liked the sound of, one she had long ago dropped as too common, too young.  With one simple utterance, the sound of her name had become something entirely different.  The emotion woven through that word was something JJ would cherish.  She had no doubt she would always remember the first time Emily ever called her Jennifer.

Loosening her grip on Emily’s waist JJ lifted her hand to gently brush her fingertips over the lips that had just changed her name forever.  Her touch was delicate as though glancing over the surface of something rare and fragile.  “Good night, Emily.”  She smiled softly as she spoke taking one last moment to gaze into those fathomless eyes before she turned and took the few steps to her door.  They had agreed and JJ knew if she stayed out here any longer she would not be able to stop.  With minimal fumbling, she opened her door and disappeared from the hall.

Emily watched JJ until she was gone before turning to open her own door, silently thanking the other woman for having the strength to do what needed to be done.  There was no way to categorize everything that had shifted in their relationship in the last few hours but, Emily was fairly certain, it had been quite enough for one night.  As it was there remained a great many questions that they would need to answer.  At the moment though, as she entered the dark quiet of her hotel room she really couldn’t think of what they were.


	12. Chapter 12

The interior of JJ’s room looked almost exactly like any number of other anonymous rooms she’d been assigned in her career.  The short entry hall had the bathroom on the left and a closet on the right.  The bed rested against the left wall of the room just past where the room opened up.   The same wall housed the obligatory neutral landscape painting.  There was a small desk in front of the window that took up most of the far wall.  There was a desk chair pulled out slightly and on the right side of the room was an overstuffed arm chair that looked only slightly worn.

JJ made her way to her ready bag that she had left on the bed and reached in to remove her toiletries.  With the way her body felt, still humming and warm, she knew she wouldn’t get a bit of sleep without a shower.  Her hope was that the water would sooth away the excess energy that seemed to be emanating from deep within her.  JJ turned on the water allowing it to warm up while she slipped out of her clothes.  As she did so she was made all too aware of the wetness that had pooled between her thighs in the course of this most extraordinary evening.

Emily made her way into her room, slipping off her jacket and tossing it haphazardly over the armchair on the left side of the room.  She then slipped off her shoes kicking them in the general direction her jacket had gone.  Her trained senses took in the layout of the room, bed against the right wall, bland hotel art above it, desk by the window, bathroom to the right as you enter, closet directly across creating a short hallway.  Some other part of her brain noted that her room was probably the mirror image of JJ’s next door.  Her ears picked up the faint sound of a shower that she assumed could only be JJ’s at this hour.  Suddenly Emily’s mind was crowded with images of JJ naked and flushed pink under the hot spray.  The imagined steam clouded what was left of Emily’s reality.

She had been aware of the tension and unspent energy in her body but thoughts of JJ in the shower seemed to dial up her heightened senses even further.  Emily found that even the feel of her clothes made her skin prickle almost uncomfortably.  With little thought she removed the troublesome articles, tossing them aside and hoping the cool air of the room would take some of the heat from her flesh.  The chill seemed to have the opposite effect, causing shivers to rush over her now exposed skin sending reminders of her arousal to skitter over her nerves.

JJ briefly toyed with the idea of turning the water to cold but, in her experience, the cold was never a good solution for an over-sensitized body.  Instead, she let warm water rush over her skin hoping to sooth away the roughened edges of her nerves.  However, the usual relaxation she felt in the shower seemed to elude her.  It only seemed to remind her of the warm, wet cavern of Emily’s mouth, the softness of her lips, and dared her to think about other warm wet places she had yet to explore.

The very thought of touching Emily, of making love to her, caused a small sound of longing to slip past JJ’s lips.  In order to keep herself upright she braced both hands against the wall and allowed the water to pour over her head as though she could wash away the deluge of highly distracting images.  JJ tried to regain control over her thoughts with little success.  She had to laugh at herself, when Hotch had dismissed the team for the night she had thought a meal and a shower would allow her to focus more clearly.  It seemed she couldn’t possibly have been more wrong.  It also seemed she had never been happier to be wrong in her life.

Emily dug in her bag trying to find her sleepwear; a soft white t-shirt and burgundy silk sleep pants.  She had always enjoyed the contrasting and yet comforting textures against her skin as she slept and she was looking for anything to help her sooth the ragged edges of her nerves.  She finally pulled them from the bottom of her bag and slipped into them enjoying the one comfort of home she always made sure she had when she was on the road. 

The fabric was cool and smooth against her overheated skin and she hoped the familiarity would help calm her as she opted to lie down.  She wasn’t fool enough to believe sleep would come quickly but she knew the sooner she tried to rest the better shot she had of getting at least a few hours in before they all had to be back to work.  As she lied down between simple cotton sheets on an unfamiliar bed she whimpered at the hope that she might hear more rustling in the room next door.  She closed her eyes attempting to block further images of JJ’s current activities from her overindulgent mind. 

JJ finally gave up on gaining any peace from the running water and turned off the faucet.  Stepping from the tub she grabbed a towel from the rack on the wall and began to dry off.  She fought valiantly to ignore the sensations of slightly rough cotton against her skin, while noting it was ridiculous that a few kisses had left her in such a state.  Okay, she had to admit to herself, it was more than a few kisses.  There had also been the dinner and nearly two years of chess-like flirting and the very real fact that kissing Emily had not felt like kissing anyone else.

No, it had definitely been a unique experience.  JJ wrapped the now damp towel around her body and padded toward the bed.  Normally she would scrounge around in her bag to find her pajamas but she didn’t think clothing would help any more than the shower had.  As she sat using a small towel to ruffle her still wet hair JJ was suddenly struck with the idea that Emily was probably only a few feet away settling into an identical bed with the same tacky bedspread but relatively fluffy pillows.  She was probably stretching her lithe limbs out under the covers right at the same moment JJ sat drying her hair.

Emily was lying relatively still, eyes still closed, trying to sort out and file all of the emotions that seemed jumbled in the middle of her brain.  She hoped the exercise in mental organization would work to distract her from the vague but persistent tingle that insisted on remaining present between her thighs.  There was a part of her that still couldn’t quite believe this night had happened at all.  There was a chance she’d wake up in the morning back in her apartment, this case and her newly budding relationship evaporating into the ether of dreams.  

The rest of her, however, could not deny the reality…didn’t want to deny the reality.  All of the parts of her she had kept safely separated were now rushing together.  Her work, her personal life, her identity; so many aspects all seemed to collide around her feelings for JJ.  If she had been asked if it was worth the risk to date a coworker all of the logical, objective parts of her would have responded with a resounding no.  The thing of it was nothing about this was logical or objective.  Knowing JJ shared her feelings, seemingly all of them not just the physical desire, having acted on them was a decision based in pure emotion.  It was an experience she’d never had before, and a part of her couldn’t help but feel exposed and timid, not to mention highly distracted.  It was complicated and visceral and more important than anything else

JJ had finished toweling off her hair but continued to sit on the edge of the bed, the rumpled white cloth in her hands.  There was little left for her to do but lie down and try to sleep.  As much as she knew she needed the rest as there wasn’t much likelihood of another early night on this case, yet somehow getting into a bed that was probably only a thin hotel wall away from Emily’s bed didn’t seem like a restful choice.  She really didn’t see how she had any other options though, so she stood and pulled back the covers.  Dropping her towels unceremoniously to the floor JJ climbed into the uninviting bed vaguely acknowledging the cool contrast of the starched sheets.  

She rolled onto her back one hand beneath her head and the other resting over the blankets on the flat plane of her stomach.  Her eyes stared, unfocused, at the ceiling her mind wandering over the events of the day.  When she thought about it the whole situation seemed almost unbelievable.  She had gone from fighting with Emily to assaulting her delicious lips in the span of fewer than twelve hours.  There had been no need for discussion or consensus or concern.  Everything simply fell into place, very real and undeniably perfect.  As her thoughts traveled, inevitably, to Emily’s lips against hers, JJ’s hand drifted from the blanket and absently gravitated higher allowing her fingertips to brush over the rosy flesh that vibrated with the memory of that touch.  

Both of Emily’s hands were interlaced behind her head in an action that reminded her of times as a child when she had been required to sit on her hands to appear calm and well behaved rather than fidgety.  Though, she readily acknowledged, the energy that was causing her to fidget now was anything but childish.  She had given up on the notion of organizing her thoughts; they were scattered beyond hope tonight.  Any progress she would make was easily derailed by the image of JJ’s blue eyes darkened cobalt from their kisses.  Or by the fresh memory of the whisper soft touch of her fingertips over Emily’s lips.  The warmth of holding JJ close moments earlier continued to press into Emily’s skin, relentlessly reminding her of the perfection she’d left to sleep alone tonight.

Thoughts of JJ’s fingers, her heat, caused Emily’s breath to hitch slightly as one of her hands slipped from behind her head to bunch in the bedding.  This feeling was completely foreign to her. The inability to bring her body back into control was overwhelming.  It seemed the harder she tried to resist the more intensely her body responded.  It occurred to her that maybe  _that_ was her problem.  All night she had surrendered to the instructions of her heart and her body, maybe  _this_ was just one more thing she needed to give in to.

As she brushed her fingertips over her lips, JJ’s mind immediately conjured an image of Emily’s fingers.  JJ’s tongue flicked out lightly as it had at the restaurant tasting just a hint of the exotic flavor of pale skin as Emily had fed her.  As she did so she felt the response in her body fluttering low in her stomach.  Her tongue ventured out further lightly wetting the tips of her fingers before beginning to trail them down her neck and chest.  Her mind easily replaced her own hand with Emily’s.  It was hardly the first time she had indulged in this particular fantasy but now that it was so close to reality the intensity of it was overwhelming.

JJ easily gave herself over to the thoughts of Emily’s hands roaming over her flesh drawing light teasing circles over her breasts expertly avoiding her nipples as they stiffened to perfect coral tips.  Nails scraped lightly over hardened flesh causing a low moan to escape from JJ’s lips.  Hours of slow burning had the blonde’s responsive body primed for more intimate touches but JJ didn’t want to rush this, it was as close as she could get and she was determined to enjoy it.

Emily loosened her grip on the bedspread and flexed her fingers.  If all her mind wanted to think about was JJ, who was she to argue.  She began to replay the feeling of JJ’s soft tongue gliding along her lip and felt her whole body react.  The hand that she had recently freed from its clasp of the covers slid beneath them delicately tracing the exposed skin between her shirt and the waistband of her sleepwear.  She let her nails draw lazy designs there highlighting the lines of muscle under the flesh of her stomach.  The motion caused her skin to twitch and amplified the already existing heat between her legs.

Knowing her own body well Emily was aware she could draw this to a quick close but she had no desire to do so.  If she couldn’t be with JJ at least she could enjoy imagining being with her.  She flattened her palm against her stomach and slid further up her torso dragging the soft fabric of her t-shirt up with it.  Her fingers brushed the underside of her breast and slipped under the fabric playing over hardening nipples allowing her to enjoy the relay of sensations from chest to groin.  She could almost feel the heat of JJ’s kisses in the warmth of her heavy exhalation.

JJ’s fingers roamed in seemingly random patterns over her skin discovering ticklish places and places that drew out heady moans of pleasure.  Delicate touches detected the thrumming of a quick but steady pulse.  One hand cupped a heavy flushed breast, thumb and forefinger delicately rolling a firm nipple. The other skittered lower dangerously close to that place that would soon prove irresistible.  Fingers curled into short silky curls not wanting to give into the draw of release just yet.  

Images mixed smoothly with reality blurring the lines between fantasy and memory.  Breath came in shaky gasps as fingers continued to play over flesh.  There was no way to deny the need for release much longer.  As her fingers slipped those last few inches lower sliding into almost burning wet heat JJ’s back arched off the bed at the contact.  She couldn’t stop the deep moan of pleasure that burned as it escaped her parted lips while her fingers fell into a familiar rhythm over her clit.

Emily left one hand teasingly just under the waistband of her pants, resting there a warm constant reminder of possible pleasure.  Her pulse pounded in her ears blocking out the sounds that she could feel sliding from her lips as she grazed a particularly sensitive spot.  She was vaguely aware of her hand inching lower, no longer resisting her body’s need to overpower her mind.  Her mouth was open slightly allowing a ghost of a gasp that had been intended to be a deep calming breath that ultimately flowed into a fading stutter between a sigh and a moan.  Her tongue flashed out wetting her bottom lip sending a shock of sensation through her body.

Disappearing entirely under silk fabric her hand slid through dark curls into building wetness.  Her clit was swollen and hot under her fingers as she began teasing circles.  Her hips bucked up off the bed in response to the vivid flash of blue eyes fluttering closed.  The carnal knowledge of soft lips joining and meshing together projected images that burned into the back of Emily’s eyelids.  Somewhere deep in her mind she registered the throaty cries that now pushed from deep within and found their release with each swipe of fingers over her tight bundle of nerves.

JJ could feel the tension mounting in her body, building on itself pushing her closer and closer to the edge.  Her body had taken over command of her senses.  Pleasure built inside her as the images in her mind became more heated blurring into flashes of dark hair and pale skin, slender fingers and red lips.  She was fairly certain she was cursing but her conscious mind couldn’t make words out of her driven utterances.  Until one word rang clearly past the other panted exclamations.  

“Emily.” The sound of that one name almost pleadingly released into the darkness of the room caused an entirely different release to rocket through JJ’s body sending waves of pleasure coursing through her veins as she drew the aftershocks from her sensitive flesh.

Sensation played over Emily’s skin as she continued to drive higher.  Thoughts of sweet smelling blond hair and intense cobalt eyes bled into strong fingers and toned arms as the white-hot flames of desire licked at her, raking her every nerve.  Her hand that had recently explored her flesh now gripped the pillow above her head giving her purchase as her body pressed upward into determined fingers.  She was so near the edge she could feel herself balancing on the razors edge, blindly teetering in that moment before all sensation exploded.

As she fell into the volcanic abyss a growl issued forth from her throat its rumble sounding remarkably like, “Jennifer.”  But Emily wasn’t aware of the proclamation as lost as she was in the pounding of her heart and the pleasure that spiraled through her body.  

Upon regaining some use of her limbs JJ rolled onto her side, Emily’s name still echoing in what she hoped to be the walls of her mind.  JJ reached for the extra pillow on her bed, and curled her relieved limbs around it.  She could still feel the ghosts of pleasure in her body but for now she could at least rest.  As her eyes drifted shut once again this time it was Emily’s smile coupled with the sound of her name on the brunette’s lips that occupied her mind.  It took surprisingly little time for the heaviness of sleep to begin to replace the weight of desire that was slowly dissipating from her tightened muscles.

Emily pulled the pillow she had been gripping down and into her embrace.  Her body deflated into the aftermath of pleasure allowing her mind to float peacefully into the arms of her memories. Now the images of JJ that filled the screen before her mind’s eye brought a contented smile to her dark lips.  Her body was tired and her mind was finally exhausted as she felt herself relax into the new pleasure of sleep and dreams of beauty and possibility.  


	13. Chapter 13

All too soon Emily’s alarm dragged her consciousness from the blissful haze of dreams to the reality of the morning.  She fumbled with her cell trying to silence the annoying buzzing that had rudely drawn her awake.  After successfully stopping the sound Emily tossed her phone onto the bed and continued to lie there staring at the ceiling.  There was the slightest bit of early dawn light coming in around the curtains barely illuminating the texture of the industrial hotel ceiling.  

The dim light seemed to emphasize the shadows in Emily’s head.  As wonderful as the previous night had been today was different.  She had to get up, shower, and face the case they had been sent here to solve.  It was strange, by the end of the previous night much of her brain had looked away from why they were here.  She wasn’t sure what to do with that fact.  Emily had always been laser focused on the job, nothing had ever been able to intrude on her well-ordered consciousness the way one dinner with JJ had done.  

Now Emily found herself in an unfamiliar position.  Within the hour she would be joining the team at the station going over the files Garcia had sent them the night before.  She would also be standing there with JJ.  Yesterday JJ had been her friend, her co-worker, and a woman with whom Emily had secretly longed for something more.  Today there was something new and intoxicating between them and the dark-haired agent wasn’t at all sure what to do with those feelings.  Nor was she certain she could hide them.  

JJ had, as usual, woken before her alarm.  The sun was not yet up but she felt wide awake though not quite ready to get out of bed.  Despite a good night of rest there was still a great deal going on in her head.  It was strange to think about the way just a few hours could change the course of a person’s life.  So often in their work they were confronted with the dark side of that truth.  Victims were usually just in the wrong place at the wrong time, or targeted for reasons they had no control over and those left behind had to come to terms with realities that suddenly made no sense.

Every day JJ looked at the faces of victims whose lives had ended or irrevocably changed in a matter of seconds.  JJ spent so much time behind the files on her desk that she had almost forgotten that change could feel good, feel right.  Last night had reminded her that sometimes good things did happen; even in the most unexpected circumstances.  The thing that she found plaguing her as she debated getting out of bed was the looming question of now what.  

It was obvious there had been a seismic shift in her relationship with Emily the night before, a shift they had both seemed to welcome.  And now it was an entirely unfamiliar type of morning after.  JJ felt certain she would have been more equipped to deal with the traditional sort of post coital awkwardness but she wasn’t familiar with the sort of giddy schoolgirl feeling she was experiencing.  It wasn’t that she doubted her own professionalism, or Emily’s for that matter, it was more just wishing they could have a little more time.  In reality though, she knew they had more important things to deal with in the immediate here and now.

Emily finally mustered up enough motivation to throw off the blankets and get out of bed.  In contrast to the previous night what she needed now was a shower, something soothing yet utilitarian to get her going and help her focus.  She padded softly across the room to fish her toothbrush and toothpaste out of her bag.  The linoleum floor of the bathroom was chilly against her bare feet and the sensation chased a bit more fog from her brain.  She turned on the shower and began brushing her teeth while the water heated up, as she did so she began the process of transitioning her attention away from last night and toward the mystery the team had to solve.

It wasn’t easy; in fact, it was remarkably difficult for Emily to put her feelings and thoughts about JJ on the back burner.  She was well aware, however, that it was the most prudent course of action.  It was going to be hard enough to make it through the day without giving away everything that was taking place between them.  Emily rinsed her mouth and put down her tooth brush giving herself a stern look in the mirror that had only just begun to fog from the warm steam of the shower.

“Come on Prentiss, get your act together.  There will be plenty of time for this when the case is done.”  Even as she spoke she wasn’t at all sure the woman looking back at her was convinced.

JJ stood and stretched loosening the last of the sleep from her muscles before making her way to the shower.  She had contemplated skipping a shower since she’d taken one before bed, but considering the events that had followed she doubted her focus would hold out if she didn’t start the day on a different note.  After quickly brushing her teeth JJ climbed under the spray and just as quickly went through her morning routine.  The blonde forced herself to focus on the business of preparing for the day rather than lingering too long under the warm water.

She knew what the day held for her, press briefings and interviews, more conversations with victims’ families wanting to know if there had been any progress.  There were always the calls from those who were desperate for some kind of closure that they hoped JJ could provide.  She always hoped she could too.  Being distracted wasn’t going to help, no matter how wonderful the reason.  JJ wasn’t about to let herself be off her game, not this time.  After rinsing the last of the soap from her body JJ stepped out and grabbed a towel.  It was time to pull herself together.

“Focus, Jennifer, focus,” she spoke to the empty room.  “You know Emily will still be there when this case is done.”  Most of her had every faith that was true, a tiny part of her, however, cursed the idea of wasting even a moment.


	14. Chapter 14

Finally prepared for the day Emily stood in the hallway waiting for the elevator that would carry her down to the lobby.  Before they had left the station the previous night it had been decided they would go in together in the morning since they’d opted to leave JJ’s bureau issue vehicle parked safely in the police garage.  It was about ten minutes before the time they had set but Emily felt like she needed a couple of minutes to prepare for this meeting.

The universe, however, seemed to have different plans as Emily heard carpet muffled footsteps approaching followed by blond hair entering her peripheral vision.  JJ stopped next to her looking up at the numbers flashing above the elevator her hands clasped loosely behind her back as much to affect an air of nonchalance as to keep her hands occupied.  She could almost feel a light blush rising in her cheeks just standing next to the dark-haired woman.  She could tell it was going to be a long day.

“Good morning,” Emily couldn’t suppress the smile she felt grow at the words, in fact she didn’t bother to try.

“Hi,” JJ couldn’t quite name the emotion she could hear in the slightly tremulous way that one word came out.  “Sleep well?”  

Emily was suddenly very glad JJ wasn’t looking her in the eye when she asked that question.  She was convinced the other woman would see right through her and know precisely what had allowed her to sleep so well.  “Yeah, you?”  As she spoke the elevator door opened and they stepped inside.

JJ cleared her throat slightly; a soft cough she hoped wouldn’t be detected as the cover up it was.  As they entered the elevator JJ moved to the wall resting her hands on the bar halfway up and leaning back against it regarding the dark-haired woman across from her.  There were so many possible ways to answer that question JJ wasn’t sure which route to take.  There was a rebellious part of her that wanted to say any number of the more risqué comments that popped into her head but she knew this was not the time.  

“Remarkably well, thanks for asking.”  JJ may have chosen an innocent answer but she couldn’t stop the half smile that crept onto her lips that lent an air of flirting to her words.

Emily positioned herself across the elevator from JJ, striking a similar pose against the opposite wall.  If the sensations that fluttered through her at the sight of JJ’s adorable smirk were any indication keeping a bit of physical distance seemed like the prudent choice.  They probably should have a real conversation about what was happening but it didn’t seem like the duration of an eight-floor elevator ride was the best time to do so.  That and the reality that the rest of the team was probably in the lobby, or would be within minutes, didn’t exactly offer them ample time to discuss their relationship.

“So,” though she knew their time was limited Emily had to say something, “we’re okay?”  It wasn’t much but it would have to do.

“Emily,” JJ straightened from the wall and took the few steps across the elevator, “if last night was any indication you and I are much, much better than okay and once this case is over I’ll prove it.  But for now, why don’t we go catch the bad guy.”  As she spoke the last sentence JJ took Emily’s hand in hers giving it a reassuring squeeze before letting it drop just as the elevator doors opened revealing the hotel lobby.

Emily watched in silence as JJ turned and exited.  She was well aware the other woman had spoken the truth.  They were on the verge of something amazing but right now, at this particular moment, they had a very important job to do.  With that thought Emily pushed herself off the wall of the elevator and followed JJ out into the lobby.

As she had suspected at least a portion of the team was there to greet them.  Reid and Morgan were standing in the lobby discussing what little they had come up with yesterday.  As a team they hated putting all of their eggs in one basket. Unfortunately, the only information they had been able to come up with yesterday seemed to point them in the direction of Gregory Michaels.

“Good morning, ladies,” Morgan smiled in greeting.  

“Hey,” JJ responded hoping neither man asked what she and Emily had done last night.  No matter how she answered they would read her like a book.  She really hated working with profilers sometimes.  “So, are we waiting for Hotch and Rossi?”  It seemed safer not to give too much opportunity for small talk.

“Actually, they just left,” Reid answered.  “Hotch wanted to make sure we had everything we needed to get started as soon as we got there.”

“Well then, let’s get going.” JJ turned and glanced at Emily as she started to move toward the door.  The group followed the motion and headed out almost as one.  The blond felt a little of the concern she’d had about the morning begin to fade as they walked out into the parking lot.  Everyone’s focus seemed aimed toward getting started on the case and not on each other, which would make everything easier.

Reid and Morgan nodded to the two women and climbed into a waiting black Suburban.  JJ and Emily continued toward their own vehicle studiously keeping their distance from one another.  The sensation of consciously avoiding natural contact with JJ felt very strange to Emily.  They had always walked together naturally, almost close enough to touch falling into step, keeping subconsciously timed rhythm.  There was something stiff and confining about avoiding something that had always happened without thought.

JJ felt tense, like she had to use far too much energy maintaining an appropriate distance from Emily.  The idea of monitoring how closely they stood or walked, whether they touched when they were talking seemed like a colossal task. JJ had promised they would do everything they could to solve this case. If so much of her mind was taken up with worry about whether or not they were being too obvious she would not be able to keep that promise.  Something had to give and fast before it all got too complicated.

“Emily,” JJ stopped just before they reached the SUV.  Now that they had a few final moments alone before they dove headlong into work it seemed there was something left for the blond to say.

“Yeah?”  Emily turned and faced the other woman clearly picking up on the seriousness of her tone.

“We can’t do this,” as soon as the words left her mouth and she saw the look of hurt and fear that filled Emily’s dark eyes JJ knew she had failed to communicate.  She immediately took a step forward closing the space between them and held both the other woman’s hands in hers.  “Shit, I didn’t mean that the way it sounded.”

Emily couldn’t speak.  At JJ’s words a fist had reached into her chest and begun squeezing her heart, the pain stopped her ability to communicate. The only thing that kept her from completely losing it was the soft warmth of JJ’s hands in hers.  Emily was confused and terrified and needed JJ to clarify what the hell she was talking about as quickly as possible.  All she could do was stare into those blue eyes and hope she wasn’t about to have her heart broken into a million pieces.

“I meant we can’t pretend like nothing happened.  We can’t try so hard not to let anyone see that there is something between us.”  JJ’s tone was soft and comforting as she struggled to take that look from Emily’s beautiful dark eyes as quickly as possible.  “In case it has escaped your keen powers of observation we are always close, we’ve been using any excuse to be next to one another for a long time now.  If we stop being who we are together we are going to give ourselves away faster than anything.”  JJ smiled hoping she had managed to dig herself out of the hole she had fallen into.

“Jesus, Jareau,” Emily exhaled heavily as she felt the other woman’s words sink in finally allowing her to breath and speak.  “How ‘bout you never scare me like that again, okay?”  Emily couldn’t believe what their initial misunderstanding had done to her.  When she had thought JJ was ending things before they even really got started her entire universe had seemed to implode.  Emily hadn’t allowed anyone in her heart in a very long time and it was disconcerting to realize she had let JJ in far enough to hurt her already.

“I’m sorry,” JJ squeezed Emily’s hands reassuringly.  “That didn’t exactly go as planned.  I just want us to be normal; anything else just seems like a stressful distraction.  So, can we just be us?”

“To be honest, I don’t think we have any choice,” Emily almost chuckled at their predicament.  “Just the walk from the hotel to the car was stressful and weird.  I know I couldn’t keep that up all day.  This is going to be…tricky.”  Emily couldn’t help but smile at the relief that seemed to sweep through her body.  Her worst fears were laid to rest by JJ’s words.  They really did have more important things to worry about than how far apart they stood.

With that thought Emily let go of JJ’s hands with a soft brush of her thumbs over the other woman’s knuckles.  She fished the keys from her pocket and pressed the button to unlock the doors so they could get in and meet up with the team at the station.  This morning was feeling like a series of false starts.  Emily kept feeling like she was ready, that she could handle the new upheaval that had found its way into her life.  Instead it seemed the only thing that was certain was that all of this was definitely going to keep her on her toes.

As JJ walked around to the passenger side to let herself in she couldn’t help but wonder how this was all going to work out.  For the moment, they had managed to relax but she didn’t know how long it would last, or if they would just end up giving everything away.  In the end it didn’t really matter, whatever happened would happen.  The simple truth was they couldn’t have their personal relationship interfere with the job.  It was too important to them. This case had plenty of unique baggage attached but it would be equally true of any unsub they had been sent to find.

Emily started the car allowing them both the privacy of their thoughts.  She was well aware that both of them needed a few minutes to pack up their emotions behind the guards that this line of work required.  Dwelling on their situation was just going to disrupt their focus.  They both knew there was no time to waste on their issues, not when this unsub was so still out there and quite possibly targeting another victim.  The previous night had been a gift the two women cherished but once they had mentally punched the clock personal time was over.


	15. Chapter 15

They arrived at the station only a couple of minutes behind Reid and Morgan who were just sitting down at the conference table to examine their copies of the file with all the information Garcia had sent from Hotch.  Two copies had been placed side by side at the two remaining chairs at the table.  Emily sat first, picking up the file and flipping it open immediately.  JJ took a second to remove her jacket and hang it over the back of her chair before joining the rest at the table.

“Gregory Michaels definitely shows confidence in the online environment. He makes no attempts at subterfuge or to shield his identity.”  Hotch began speaking with no preamble knowing the team would join in the discussion readily.

“He never makes any mention of his sister in any of his commentary,” Reid observed as he quickly read through the pages that included excerpts from Michaels’ personal blogs and posts from various political and religious message boards.

“He probably didn’t want to acknowledge her existence,” Morgan stated contemptuously before switching focus as he thumbed through the file.  “He works for a technology firm but it doesn’t say what he does.”

“It looks like they contract with hundreds of other companies,” Emily interjected as she reached the page with his current employment statistics.  “It’ll probably take Garcia more time to find out exactly which contracts he’s working on.”

Rossi closed his file and got up from the table as they talked.  He paced a couple of steps, turned to face the team and paused crossing his arms before starting to speak.  “We know this guy attacks lesbians.  He keeps them for at least two days before killing them.  There are no signs of sexual assault but evidence of other kinds of abuse.  He is extremely meticulous and leaves virtually no physical evidence on the bodies once he dumps them.  There seems little doubt he is attempting to send a message by leaving the bodies in public places they can easily be found.  We are most likely looking for a white male in his late twenties to early thirties with some sort of steady employment.  Organization and planning are required for him to abduct, hide, and murder these women as efficiently as he does.”

“It is still unclear why he targeted these particular victims,” Hotch picked up Rossi’s train of thought, trying to profile the crime not necessarily this one suspect.  “There seems to be no obvious –.” His words were cut short by the beeping of Emily’s cell phone.

Emily looked around the room noting that almost anyone who would be sending her a message was already there.  Her mother wasn’t the type to text and Garcia would have called them if she’d found new information.  With a look of mild confusion, she reached for her hip and extracted her phone looking down at the new message on the screen.

_God gave them over to shameful lusts…Men committed shameful acts with other men…_

She stared at the words for a moment trying to make sense of why they had appeared on the screen of her phone.  The longer she stared at them the less sense they made.  She glanced at the phone number attached to the text but it was not one she recognized.  Somewhere in her brain it clicked that the area code was 503, definitely local.  As this bit of information filtered through her confusion so did JJ’s voice.

“Are you okay?”  The concern in JJ’s tone was obvious.  Without a thought, she reached out and briefly rested her hand on Emily’s arm.  She had never seen a look of shock on Emily’s face before. The other woman was skilled in covering her emotions on the job.  Nothing seemed to faze her, but everything about her body language was broadcasting the fact that whatever had appeared on her phone was decidedly unnerving.  

“I think I just got a text from our unsub.”  Emily knew she sounded stunned.  “Morgan, call Garcia, have her track-” Before she had finished her sentence her phone beeped again revealing another message from the same number.

_and received in themselves the due penalty for their error. Romans 1:26-27_

Even as Emily was speaking Morgan was hitting speed dial. 

“Hey baby girl, we need you to trace the last text message sent to Emily’s cell phone,” Morgan didn’t waste time on preamble as he knew Garcia would be right on whatever he asked for.

“You got it,” even as the words left her lips Garcia’s fingers were flying across her keyboard frantically following signals and trails to try and track the location from which the message had originated. “This is nuts, the signal seems to be coming from all over the place, I can’t get a fix on it.  I’ve got the number it came from but where that phone is located is anybody’s guess.”  Frustration was evident in the tone of the tech analyst’s voice.

“I know you won’t fail me,” Morgan said with cool confidence.  “As long as you have a name for me it’ll be more than we have now.”

“That’s weird,” a note of confusion was added to the already existing frustration in her voice.  “The number belongs to Marissa Jones, the second victim.”

Morgan quickly communicated this bit of information to the rest of the team before saying goodbye and letting Garcia get back to tracking down any more information on the origins of the texts.  He knew her inability to immediately track the phone’s location would only inspire her to search that much harder for anything else she could find.  As the call ended the team seemed to burst into a flurry of mental activity.

“I obviously didn’t just get a text from a dead woman,” Emily could feel a bit of anger bleeding into her voice.  It was one thing to suddenly become part of a case, it was quite another to have him using the identity of one of his victims as a shield.  

“He probably keeps the phones,” Rossi stated.  “Even a mission based killer like this one is bound to keep something to remind himself of the righteous path he is on.”

“That doesn’t explain how the phones and numbers are still active,” Reid offered.  

“Nor does it bring us any closer to finding him,” Emily countered.  

 “Actually, it might,” Hotch pointed out, “we’ll have Garcia cross-reference Gregory Michaels against any cellular company contracts held by his company.”

Emily tried to reorder her thoughts.  Of everything she was worried about that morning, receiving texts from a psychopath wasn’t high on her list. She set the phone on the table in front of her, unable to stop staring at it even as Reid reached across the table and took it.  With a firm but brief shake of her head Emily tried to follow the continuing conversation.  She knew she had missed at least a bit of it but didn’t let on she was playing catch up.

“He shortened the quote,” Reid observed.  “The entire verse is ‘ _Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.’_   It is commonly used by fundamentalists to condemn homosexuality.  Though, many bible scholars question the validity of such literal translations.”  After his explanation, he returned the phone to the table in front of Emily. 

“I’m sure figured we’d look the rest of it up.”  Morgan brought the discussion back to the practical rather than indulge Reid’s tendency toward more esoteric discussions.

“The more important question,” Rossi interjected, “is why he sent the message to Emily.”

Emily schooled her features into a quiet mask of concentration, hiding the turmoil she felt roiling inside of her.  It wasn’t so much that she was the current focus of the attention of a deadly unsub, for some reason that seemed almost expected.  The BAU dealt with killers and psychopaths and eventually that meant danger brushed very closely to their lives.  But there was something truly disturbing about the idea that this unsub had, quite possibly, picked up on something Emily had always considered extremely private.

“If Gregory Michaels is indeed the unsub,” Hotch began speaking before Emily could say anything, “it may just be the simple fact that she was the agent that has had contact with him.  Or it could simply be the classic need to interject himself into the investigation in order to ensure his message is heard.”

“If that were the case wouldn’t he be sending some sort of manifesto?”  Morgan sounded mildly frustrated at all the talk and little action.

“I’ll check with my media contacts and make sure none of them have received anything of interest.”  JJ could feel a sense of urgency, a need to do something building within her.  Though Emily was successfully holding it together to the casual observer JJ had long ago ceased being a casual observer when it came to the dark-haired agent and she could see this was affecting her.  JJ had been committed to solving this case from the moment it crossed her desk and that feeling was only made stronger by the look deep in Emily’s eyes.

Hotch nodded his agreement as JJ spoke indicating she should follow up on the thought immediately.  She wasted no time getting started quickly grabbing her own PDA and looking up the appropriate numbers.  As she did so she glanced in Emily’s direction capturing the other woman’s eyes.  There were so many things she wanted to say, so many emotions filling her chest.  Her only choice was to allow each of those swirling emotions to fill her eyes and hope she could broadcast something to soothe a bit of the turmoil that was hiding in that dark troubled gaze.  

Emily returned JJ’s stare for a moment soaking in the warm intensity she saw in those blue depths hoping her silent thanks was heard by the other woman.  Even with the chaos that seemed to be encroaching around her JJ’s presence filled her with a kind of peace she was certain she had never experienced before.  With an almost imperceptible moment of hesitation she broke the shared link.  She returned her gaze to the papers before her hoping some answer was hidden there waiting for the puzzle pieces to fall into place.  


	16. Chapter 16

“We need to send the local police by Gregory Michaels’ house.”  Emily couldn’t let her gut feeling about him rest silently any longer.  She was well aware of the limited amount of evidence in this case but it was time to stop relying on the tangible.  So much of what they did every day was based in the intuitive and it allowed them to track down killers when physical evidence was scarce, the BAU had redefined the longstanding police practice of following a hunch.

“Unfortunately,” Hotch’s brow furrowed as he spoke, “there has been a unit on his house all night and he hasn’t been home.  Right now we have no clear idea of where he might be headed.”

“Have we had anyone check his mother’s?”  Emily asked.  “It seems like the most logical place for him to go if he doesn’t feel safe at home.”

“That is our first order of business,” Hotch responded readily.  “Reid, Morgan why don’t you head over to Mrs. Michaels’ and see if she has heard from her son recently.”

“Hotch,” Emily stood and spoke a tone of determination in her voice.  “I think I should go with Reid.”

“Do you really think that’s a good idea considering you may be heading directly to our unsub?  An unsub who has started focusing his attention on you?”  Hotch’s tone was firm as he asked the questions making it clear he had very strong doubts about her suggestion.

“I’m the only one who has talked to him.” Emily was equally firm.  “I have seen how he looks at pictures of his mother and therefore have the clearest understanding of that relationship.  Even if he isn’t there I’m certain she’ll know he’s already spoken with me and that gives me the best opportunity to get her to open up as well.” 

Hotch paused before answering considering the look on Emily’s face that plainly conveyed the fact that she was not going to take no for an answer, and dangerous or not she had a point.  He never liked the feeling of putting one of his team in harm’s way but he also knew the risks this job entailed.

“Alright,” Hotch capitulated, “but you are taking Reid with you and I want you to check in once you arrive and as soon as you are done.  Morgan, you and Rossi can do some digging into other areas of Michaels’ life.  Start with his church, as often as he mentions it in his blog someone there is bound to know him.”

Emily stood and exited the room out into the hallway.  As she did so she came face to face with JJ, who had left the room to begin making calls to her media contacts.  Emily wasn’t sure what to do.  She stood momentarily frozen, caught by questioning blue eyes.  JJ ended her call and stepped in front of the other woman.

They faced each other neither knowing what to say, if they should say anything at all.  The silence that hung between them was almost palpable.  JJ may not have known exactly where Emily was headed but she knew enough to feel the first pangs of worry in her gut.  She always worried about Emily when she risked herself on a case but it would be foolish to pretend last night hadn’t changed anything.  If something happened to Emily now, with all of the potential, all of the possibility that had blossomed between them, she would be devastated.  At the same time JJ was fully aware that she couldn’t do anything to stop the other woman from doing her job.  More than that, she knew she didn’t want to.

There were only a few reasons Emily would have left the briefing room and JJ knew that most of them meant she was leaving to conduct more interviews, interviews that could lead her closer to a killer.  It wasn’t as though JJ hadn’t watched Emily leave dozens of times on dozens of cases but there was so much that was different now.  Fear and responsibility tugged equally at her and stole any words that she could have thought to form.  Though only seconds had past time was moving painfully slowly as they stood staring at each other.

Emily could see the conflict in those blue eyes and she wished they were in a position for her to soothe it and make it disappear.  But they were standing in the hallway of a police station and the feelings that stretched between them were too new for her to have any idea what to do.  The case was what it was and the fact that she seemed to be moving toward the center of it didn’t change the reality that she had a job to do.  The conflict she felt in her chest was something she’d never experienced, then again the feelings she had for JJ were something all together new as well.

“I have to go.”  Emily didn’t know if the words were a statement, a plea, or an explanation.  In the end, it was probably a mixture of all of them.  

“I know.”  It was a simple statement but JJ knew it was the truth.  She did know.  She knew Emily had to do the job.  The danger they both faced every day was part of the package and JJ was fully aware there would be a day when the she would be the one heading out the door.  

Reid entered the hallway just as JJ’s words had faded.  Emily broke eye contact with JJ and glanced over at the young doctor.  He nodded at her and headed further down the hallway.  Emily spared one last parting glance at JJ hoping that somehow her few words had communicated everything that needed to be said.  As she passed the other woman she felt JJ’s hand grip her upper arm.

“Emily,” JJ paused, “be careful.”  She had given in to the part of herself that needed more than just a nod and a goodbye.

“I will, I promise.”  Again, Emily chose the simplest words to convey a multitude of sentiments.  She didn’t ever make promises lightly but there was no way this unsub, no matter how dangerous, was going to destroy what they could have.  She turned away from JJ squaring her shoulders and joining Reid as he walked down the hall.  Emily could feel JJ’s eyes on her as she stepped toward the door and she both loved and feared the sensation.

JJ watched Emily walking away and felt as though a crucial bit of herself was leaving in the hands of the other woman.  It wasn’t until the double doors at the end of the hallway swung closed behind the two agents that JJ was able to move.  The sense of urgency she had felt all along with this case was now magnified.  JJ couldn’t shake the notion that the harder she worked the faster this case would be solved and the sooner she would know, for the moment at least, Emily was safe.   


	17. Chapter 17

“What sort of relationship do you think he has with his mother?”  Reid’s natural curiosity kicked in shortly after they got in the SUV to drive to Helen Michaels’ house.  Emily, having been the only member of the team who had met the possible unsub, was a wealth of information for the young doctor.

“I’m not sure,” Emily’s tone was thoughtful for a myriad of reasons.  “His view of his mother is complicated.  He obviously holds her in a position of respect, but that may be solely based in the Christian ideal of ‘honoring thy mother and father’.  She is the one who got him to report his sister’s disappearance to the police so I would think they don’t necessarily share all of the same beliefs.”

“Do you think he would actually turn to her for help,” Reid asked.  “If she already forced him into contact with the authorities he may not turn to her if he’s feeling exposed.”

“Possibly true,” Emily replied, “but if he is the unsub sending text messages to FBI agents doesn’t exactly indicate he has a fear of exposure.”

“Yes, but whoever sent those messages went to great lengths to cover their tracks.”  Reid countered warming to the theoretical discussion.  “If his technological savvy is enough to throw Garcia off the trail for more than a few hours he obviously isn’t exactly prepared to be discovered.”

“I’m not sure it is fear of discovery so much as fear of being stopped before his mission is complete.”  Emily felt certain the fact that the text messages had contained scripture was about the unsub trying to show them the light not about making excuses.  She only hoped they would track him down before he claimed any other lives.  It seemed all too often more bodies had to pile up before the case was solved.  Emily knew mission based killers rarely stopped unless they were caught she also knew there was every chance this unsub would kill again.  At this point it was only a matter of time.

“If that were the case then why bother contacting us at all?”  Reid continued attempting to work out as many of the grey areas of the profile as possible as they neared Helen Michaels’ suburban home.

“Because the killing is meaningless without the message.  He has the entire gay community living in fear but he doesn’t want people to fear him, he wants people to fear God.”  Emily could hear the underlying tone of anger in her own voice as she maneuvered the SUV into the driveway on a quiet cul-de-sac and parked.  

__________________

“Thanks for your time Bobby.” JJ paused listening to the voice on the other end of the phone.  “Please let me know if anything comes across your desk that looks interesting.”  She flipped her phone closed with the finality of having made the last call on her list.

“Anything?”  Hotch asked as he walked into the conference room.

“No,” JJ felt more than a slight frustration at feeling useless.  “I’ve contacted all of the major media outlets and most of the minor ones but no one has received anything that even remotely resembles a message our guy would send.”

“Well,” Hotch did his best to sound reassuring rather than express any of the emotions he kept under tight control.  “We knew it was a bit of a long shot going into it.”

“I guess,” JJ let out a soft sigh.  “I did get a chance to reassure the local gay press that we are doing everything we can to make the streets safe, though from internet comments the community isn’t very convinced our presence really matters.”

“JJ,” Hotch had the slightest hint of hesitancy in his voice.  “Are you alright?”  He left the question simple knowing they had held enough conversations around the difficulty of their jobs for her to know what he was asking.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” JJ knew it wasn’t entirely the truth but she wasn’t going to say anything else.  She could tell by Hotch’s expression that he wasn’t completely buying her answer.  His serious, questioning gaze didn’t leave her face as he waited for her to continue.  Once again, she was forced to curse the fact that she worked with profilers.  

Hotch could tell JJ wasn’t going to say anything else.  He could also tell she was holding back.  His job required treading a fine line with the agents who worked under him, especially now that Gideon was gone.  The responsibility for their well-being, both physical and psychological, rested quite squarely on his shoulders and he took it very seriously.  How much emotional investment was just enough without being too much was something completely vague and constantly changing.  Over time he had learned that JJ always functioned in that grey area.  

“Hotch,” JJ used her most no-nonsense tone as she watched the wheels turning in his head.  “You don’t need to watch out for me.  I really am fine.  I just wish I had gotten some results.  You know as well as I do this job sucks when it feels like you are just spinning your wheels.”  She could see that her words had gotten through whatever thoughts had made him look so pensive.

Hotch opened his mouth to speak just as his cell rang.  He reached for his belt and brought the phone to his ear.  “Hey Prentiss,” he thought he caught the barest glimpse of something flash in JJ’s eyes as he spoke but it was gone before he could identify it.  “You and Reid take your time with Mrs. Michaels right now she’s the best lead we’ve got…Right…Call me when you are done and we’ll meet back here to debrief after your interview.” 

JJ watched the one side of the conversation part of her wishing she could hear the other.  She chided herself for worrying so much and tried to remind herself that Emily had done these types of interviews a thousand times and nothing too serious had ever happened.  Even as she had the thought though a part of her couldn’t help but remember what had happened when she and Reid had gone out into the Georgia countryside following what seemed like a rather innocuous lead.

“Reid and Prentiss are at Helen Michaels’ house now,” Hotch said after hanging up.  “They’ll let us know as soon as they are done there.  They’re fine JJ,” Hotch watched JJ relax slightly at his reassurance and he started to understand a little more about why this case was so hard for JJ.


	18. Chapter 18

The Congregation of the Living Water church looked like any other house of worship built in the mid-fifties.  The building itself was moderately sized with high windows and a large cross that divided the double doors of the entryway and extended up to the highest point of the roof.  Morgan and Rossi strolled up to the doors looking around for signs of the pastor.  In the yard to the right a redhead in his late teens to early twenties was weeding a small flower bed.

As the two men approached he stood and brushed his muddy hands off on his worn work pants.  “Good morning,” he spoke in a soft almost timid voice.  “Can I help you gentlemen?”

“Possibly,” Rossi spoke first flipping out his badge. “I’m Agent Rossi; this is Agent Morgan we’re with the FBI.”

“I’m not sure what you’d be here for but there’s really no one here to talk to,” the young man shrugged indicating he didn’t know what to do to help.

“You’re here,” Morgan pointed out brusquely.

“Yeah,” he shrugged again, “but I’m just pulling some weeds as a favor to Pastor John.  He’s out running some errands for the church.”

“Nice of you to help out,” Rossi observed in a neutral tone.  “Do you have a minute to maybe help us out too?”

“I don’t know what I can do for you but yeah I’ve got a minute.”  He crossed his arms nervously as he spoke.

“Do you know Gregory Michaels?  We’re investigating his sister’s murder,” Morgan kept his voice calm trying to help the young man relax.

“Greg?  Yeah, I know Greg he’s been coming to church here for about four years.  He’s a good man with strong faith.  It’s a shame some of that didn’t rub off on his sister.”  It didn’t take a great deal of profiling skill to pick up the disdain in his voice as he spoke the last sentence.  

“Have you seen him lately?”  Rossi, for the moment, tactfully ignored his more editorial comments.

“Not since Sunday services, but he never misses those.”  He stated matter-of-factly.  “Why are you looking for Greg?” Both men could see an obvious challenge in the young man’s green eyes.

“We’re just trying to get as much information as possible about the victims in order to more clearly understand why they were chosen.”  Rossi answered knowing full well they wouldn’t get anywhere if they let on they suspected Gregory Michaels.

“From what I’ve read in the papers it seems pretty obvious why they were picked.  Or did I read it wrong and they weren’t really all homos?”  The young man’s quiet voice took on a cruel edge as he almost spat the last words.

Rossi and Morgan exchanged a quick glance at the vehemence present in the man’s tone.  They could both tell there was obviously something going on in this guy’s head that was shared with their unsub.  It seemed a few more questions were in order.

“That’s true, Mr…?” Rossi left the question hanging in the air hoping the young man would fill in the blank.

“Hutchins.  Andrew Hutchins.”  His voice had gone from hard to wary again as he shared his name with some reluctance.


	19. Chapter 19

Emily and Reid had been welcomed into Helen Michaels’ home and invited to sit around the island in her well-lit kitchen.  Emily noted that her son bore a striking resemblance to his mother, one that hadn’t been quite reflected in the photos around his house.  They shared the same shade of hair and eyes, though his mother’s sandy blond was sprinkled with grey.

So far, they had only exchanged the most basic of pleasantries.  The ease at which they had been welcomed inside indicated that Michaels either wasn’t here or his mother had no idea what was happening.  Emily was trying the gentlest approach she could manage to coax what information they could.

“As Dr. Reid mentioned we are investigating the murder of your daughter and three other women,” Emily began.  “We have every reason to believe the same individual is responsible for all four deaths.”

“Yes,” Helen’s voice shook slightly as she spoke.  “The police said that the last time they were here.  I warned Erin she was putting herself in danger but she had no use for my motherly advice.”

“What was she doing to put herself at risk?”  Emily spoke in a soft interested tone.  She was fairly certain she already knew the answer to the question but they needed to hear it in the other woman’s words.

“Living that life, I told her it wasn’t safe,” the quaver in her voice increased.  “Her brother tried to tell her too but she just wouldn’t listen.”

“What sort of relationship did Erin have with her brother,” Reid interjected for the first time since they had sat down.

“Well,” she paused for a moment, “they had sibling disagreements, competition, the usual you know.  It seemed to get worse after their father passed away.”

“Have you seen your son much since his sister’s death?”  Emily inquired finding the subtlest way she could to unearth one of the critical bits of information they required.

“He comes over for dinner every Sunday.  It has been quite a comfort to me since I’ve lost both Erin and her father.”  Helen’s voice took on a distant quiet tone as she continued to speak.  “Greg is all I have left.”

“Your husband died two years ago?” Emily asked hoping Helen would open up about the details surrounding his death.

“Yes,” Helen paused before continuing.  “It was just six weeks after Erin told us…well…I’m sure you know what she told us.”

“He died shortly after Erin came out,” Emily supplied her tone studiously neutral.

“I’m sure the two events had nothing to do with one another,” Reid interjected.

Helen Michaels took a sip of her coffee remaining silent not making eye contact with either agent.  Emily watched her.  She could see the very real pain in the woman’s face and didn’t slight her for it.  It was also clear that somewhere in her heart she did equate her daughter’s coming out with her husband’s heart attack.  The thing Emily was curious about was whether that opinion was originally hers or if it had been planted by her son.

“Did Greg blame his sister for his father’s death?”  Emily knew the question wasn’t subtle but sometimes the clearest question got the clearest answer.

“As I said things were tense between them after Sean died,” Helen answered vaguely.  “But they had always been very different children and then Erin was killed.  It’s not as though they had time to resolve their issues before that happened.”

“Greg told me you asked him to report his sister missing.  What had you worried enough to think she might be in trouble?”  Emily pressed forward hoping the right question might trigger some more straightforward answers.

“She didn’t make it to Sunday dinner and wasn’t answering her phone.  I was worried   No matter how difficult things were, Erin was a good girl and she always made it to dinner.  Greg always said I worried too much about her, that she’d obviously made her choices about what was important.  But, I started to get concerned after a couple more days passed and I hadn’t heard from her.  Sean always took care of things when he was alive and Greg hated to see me fret so I asked and he called,” there was no defensiveness in her voice, just a tired sadness.


	20. Chapter 20

Rossi and Morgan took the moment of silence to observe the young man’s reactions to their conversation.  Moments without words were often the most telling of a person’s mental state.  Tension and anger were obvious in his expression and stance.  The tightness around his lips and emotion flashing in his eyes clearly broadcast that he wasn’t happy with any of the interaction he had been having with the two agents.

“Look, I don’t know what you want with Greg or me for that matter,” Andrew opted to fill the silence with his own words.  “But whatever happened to those girls had nothing to do with any of us.  God has his own punishments for those who turn their backs on the righteous path.”

“Is there something wrong here, Gentlemen?”  A new voice came from the left and they turned to see an older man in his sixties with silver grey hair and a well manicured beard.

“These men are from the FBI Pastor John.” Andrew answered before Rossi or Morgan could introduce themselves.  “They’re looking for Greg Michaels.”

“I’m Special Agent Rossi and this is Special Agent Morgan,” Rossi began speaking as though Andrew hadn’t said anything.  “We’re investigating the murder of Mr. Michaels’ sister and three other women.”

“I appreciate you talking with the agents Andrew,” Pastor John’s voice was soothing.  “Why don’t you get back to work and I’ll take it from here.”

Andrew nodded, it seemed he knew when he was being dismissed and felt no need to argue.  Without a word he turned and walked back to the small flower bed he had been weeding.  He knelt and began plucking weeds from the dirt.  Morgan watched the tension in his shoulders and noted that it didn’t let up as he worked.  He made the mental note to have Garcia look into the young man’s life before he turned his attention back to Rossi and Pastor John.

“I’m afraid Gregory hasn’t been here since Sunday services.”  The older man seemed quite at ease as he faced the agents.

“Is that typical for him, only being around on Sundays?”  Morgan asked though he was fairly certain he knew the answer.  With as large a part as the church played in his online presence it would be rather surprising if he didn’t have broader participation in church activities.

“We all have moments when our daily lives take precedence over our spiritual endeavors.”  There was no hesitation in his answer, as if the statement cleared up everything.  “There is little else I can tell you.  Gregory is a faithful parishioner whose presence has enriched our congregation since he joined.”


	21. Chapter 21

 

It had become increasingly obvious to both Emily and Reid that if Gregory Michaels had chosen to go into hiding he hadn’t sought help from his mother.  She seemed sad and lost more than anything else, as though everything her family had gone through in the last few years had broken some part of her.  They both made their polite goodbyes and returned to the car.  Emily was torn between disappointment at not finding the possible unsub and a certain degree of relief at not finding what could have been a remarkably dangerous situation. 

Reid and Emily drove in silence each lost in their own thoughts.  Neither profiler was a stranger to family dysfunction in their personal or professional lives but ironing out the intricacies of an unsub’s family always brought with it a marked level of introspection.  Emily could tell Helen had been torn between her children, the love and pain was obvious in her voice.  It was also clear she had grown accustomed to submitting her will to her husband and then to her son once the former was gone.  Emily couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness and compassion for Erin, the daughter who seemed to have gotten lost even before she had been killed.   

Emily could relate to the struggle the young woman must have gone through.  Trying to be the ‘good daughter’, coming home for dinner every Sunday, continually trying to have some sort of relationship with her family though it was clear they didn’t accept her.  She didn’t have to try very hard to imagine what that coming out conversation must have been like.  She could just imagine the tears and recriminations that accompanied that moment of honesty. 

As Emily thought about it she could almost hear the echoes of her mother’s own voice superimposed over what she imagined Erin had heard.  Though the admonitions contained less religion and more about appearances the emotions were the same.  The hurt, the anger, the fear, on both sides, coupled with parental disappointment and disapproval it was a story as common as it was individual. Emily was well aware of the dangers of injecting too much of one’s self in a case but she also knew it was nearly impossible to avoid it entirely.  Even for her, and especially when the wall dividing her own experience and that of the victim was so thin. 

“So, if Michaels didn’t reach out to his mother,” Reid’s voice gave Emily a mild start as he broke the silence that had settled thickly over them.  “Where did he go?” 

“That certainly is the million-dollar question isn’t it,” Emily responded not bothering to cover the sardonic tone in her voice. 

_____________________ 

JJ had felt a bit of the tightness in her chest ease when she heard Hotch answer the call from Reid letting him know he and Emily were on their way back from Helen Michaels’ house.  She could tell from the brief flash of disappointment that had visited Hotch’s face that they were no closer to finding their unsub.  Though she understood the feeling she couldn’t help but relish the moment of relief that nothing had happened to Emily. 

With all her calls made and the local PD properly dispatched and seemingly doing their jobs well there was little for JJ to do.  At the moment, all she could do was stare out the window of the conference room because that was certainly better than staring into the faces of the victims looking down from the evidence board.  Though it seemed to the blond she could feel the weight of their gazes on her back and she knew nothing would stop it until they solved this case. 

She turned slowly, facing the board, and the four faces at once smiling from family photos and then pale, bruised, and dead.  JJ could not deny the feeling of seeing herself in each of those faces.  Young women that were just trying to live honest lives, young women that JJ had to admit had been more honest than she had.  She admired their courage, mourned their loss, and vowed again their deaths would not be in vain.  Not only would this team find their killer, JJ’s own life would forever be changed by this case and the spark of hope in her chest made her think Emily’s would too. 

“Are they saying anything?” JJ jumped at the sound of Emily’s voice just behind her to the left.  Apparently, she had been more absorbed in her thoughts than she realized as she hadn’t heard the other woman enter the conference room. 

JJ smoothly covered her startled state and turned to face the dark-haired agent before she spoke.  “Only that I’ve been far too afraid for far too long,” was JJ’s answer as her crystal gaze met Emily’s dark one and held it for a few long seconds breaking away only when Reid and Hotch came in already discussing the meeting with Helen Michaels. 

“It doesn’t seem as though he has sought out his mother,” Reid was explaining to Hotch.  At the sound of the young doctor’s voice both women turned their attention to the other agents. 

“So,” JJ interjected, “one step forward two steps back. We do seem to be spending an awful lot of time at square one on this case.” 

“We may have found something to move forward,” Rossi spoke as he entered the door.  He and Morgan found seats at the conference table.  “We spoke with another parishioner from Michaels’ church and it seems clear where his ideals originated.” 

“We need Garcia to check out everything we can find out about this church,” Hotch spoke up immediately not wanting to waste any time following up a potential lead. 

“One step ahead of ya, boss,” Morgan replied.  “I called her on the way over and she’s looking into the church and Andrew Hutchins the guy Rossi and I talked to at Living Water.  She should be calling with her information any minute.” 

With seemingly impeccable timing once again the laptop in the center of the table chirped to life with the image of Penelope Garcia in the center. 

“Greetings daring crime fighters,” Garcia’s voice grabbed everyone’s attention.  “I have minimal information on young Mister Hutchins.  Looks like a typical teenager, got into a couple of scuffles at school but nothing major.  Graduated three years ago from public school and has attended Fellowship of the Living Water for that long as well.  The church itself is a tad more interesting, and by a tad I mean eerily significant.” 

Garcia paused as her fingers flew across the keyboard in front of her just out of the line of sight of the camera.  It was a few brief moments before she spoke again.  “I found this video of a sermon at the Fellowship of the Living Water from about six months ago and you may not only find it interesting but you may want to check out the front row.” 

With a couple more clicks the image of Garcia on the computer screen was replaced by an obviously amateur video of a smooth voiced silver haired gentleman that both Morgan and Rossi immediately recognized as Pastor John.  He began by looking briefly down at the Bible open in front of him and then began to speak in that same calm voice he had used when he spoke to Morgan and Rossi. 

 _And the L_ _ORD_ _God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and_ _closed up_ _the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the L_ _ORD_ _God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said,_ _This_ _is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man._ _Therefore_ _shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed._  

He paused closing the Bible and looking out over his congregation before he began to speak again. “God leaves little question as to how he intended us to wed intended us to live.  Men should marry women, be with women.  Woman was created from man, for man by God Almighty Himself.  Anything else is simply an affront to God’s order anything else leads to the grip of darkness.  God will not be mocked and each time a man or a woman commits an act of perversion they are mocking God.” 

Stepping from behind his pulpit Pastor John paced across the dais as he spoke.  When he approached the foremost edge the front row of the congregation came into the camera frame revealing Gregory Michaels staring with rapt attention.  Further down the row Morgan noticed a shock of red hair and recognized Andrew Hutchins whose attention seemed torn between Pastor John and Greg. 

“There is talk of loving the sinner but hating the sin.  God does not love sinners, God punishes sinners.  God has made his words clear and we can have faith in them.  Follow the path of righteousness and you have nothing to fear from God.  Follow the path of darkness and sin and the punishment shall be swift and complete.”  With those words the video paused and was replaced with Garcia’s image on the screen once more. 

“It goes on like that for a few more minutes,” Garcia stated the distaste obvious in her voice.  

Emily had to take a series of deep breaths; she knew there were preachers out there that delivered these sermons.  She was well aware of the discrimination that existed throughout American culture but there was something about hearing it delivered, hearing how smooth and charmingly the words were spoken that hit her like a kick in the gut.  It was a struggle to keep her responses controlled and she found it even more difficult when troubled blue eyes momentarily captured hers clearly communicating anger and frustration.  Emily could hide her own emotions with practiced ease but seeing those emotions on that beautiful face hit her in a way she had never learned to cover. 

There was only a brief second before someone would start commenting, discussing the content of the video in the clinically detached way they all had of dissecting evidence and JJ wasn’t at all sure she could do it.  Anger rose within her like bile chocking off her better senses.  This man wore the mantle of a man of God, the words almost screamed in her head, how in the hell could he claim to speak for God?  What gave him the right to be the final arbiter of what was acceptable in the eyes of the almighty?  That and the way those parishioners looked at him, taking in each word as if there was no reason on earth or in heaven to question the truth of it made her want to yell, or punch something.  Instead she looked across the conference table into dark troubled eyes finding strange comfort in the small window Emily allowed only briefly and only for her. 

“Not only was Michaels in that crowd shot,” Morgan drew everyone’s attention, “the guy we talked to at the church, Andrew Hutchins, was also there.  Hey, baby girl, can you bring up that image?” 

“Most certainly,” Garcia’s fingers tapped quickly on her keyboard and mouse and the screen was again filled with a still shot of Pastor John and the first couple of rows of the crowd at the church. 

“Three seats down from Michaels,” Morgan pointed, “that’s the kid we talked to and he seems far more interested in him than the sermon.”  Rather than staring at Pastor John as all the others were Andrew was clearly staring with rapt attention at Gregory Michaels.  For a second no one else spoke as they absorbed the information in that observation.  It wouldn’t be the first time someone killed to wipe out what they most hated in themselves. 

In the moment of silence Emily’s phone sounded almost abnormally loud.  Before she could even reach for it to see what message she’d just received Garcia was busy once again at her keyboard. She could be seen on the computer screen typing away frantically trying to track down the location of the phone that had just sent a text to Emily’s phone. 

“I set up a trace to alert me to any activity involving Emily’s cell,” Garcia said before Emily could read her message.  “The signal keeps playing tag with all of my tracking programs but I’m doing my best.”  They could all see the intensity in Garcia’s face as she continued to run down as many lines of cyber intelligence she could manage.  All eyes in the room turned from the computer screen to Emily who had finally opened the message she had just received from a different, as yet unidentified, local number. 

 _For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies._  

Emily read the words aloud with none of the trepidation she’d felt when the first text had appeared on her phone.  There was some part of her that had expected this, been waiting for it really.  It wasn’t that she was immune to the reality of receiving a text from a dead woman’s phone sent by the person who killed her.  It was more that each text meant he was more fixated on them than another victim and each one brought them the smallest step closer to finding him.  She looked up from her phone to meet the five sets of worried eyes focused on her.  Though she knew they were all set on her the only ones she noticed were deep blue and full of profound concern. 

“Matthew 15:19,” Reid stated matter-of-factly, “a quote in a similar vein to the previous text.  The next verse is ‘these are the things which defile a man’.” 

“Emily,” Hotch spoke urgently, “text the second half of the quote back.  Quickly before he shuts down the line.” 

Emily began rapidly typing Reid’s words into the phone realizing what Hotch was trying to do.  If they could keep him engaged just a few minutes longer it would greatly increase Garcia’s chances of tracking him down to a more precise location.  She entered the last word and sent the message back to the unsub.  She imagined it, for a moment, whizzing through the air trying to make it back before he turned off the phone and severed their one connection to him.  She knew there was a certain amount of risk in engaging the unsub in any way but there were times the only way to win the game was to play even if they weren’t the ones making up the rules.   

There was no sound in the room except the tapping of Garcia’s fingers on her keyboard through the speakers on the computer.  It was as though the minute Hotch had spoken the team had taken a collective breath and held it.  As long as Garcia was still typing there was a chance that the signal was still live and they could track him down.  Emily stared at her phone waiting to see if she received a message in return.  If he answered it would be their first chance to have any sort of dialogue with the unsub.  If they managed to open up communication they would be light years ahead of where they had been when they had resumed the investigation that morning. 


	22. Chapter 22

The sound of the beep of the incoming text message seemed discordant and loud in the stressful silence that had filled the room.  Had she been a different type of person there was every chance Emily would have jumped and fumbled her phone even though she had fully expected the sound.  Being Emily Prentiss, however, she didn’t flinch.  Her thumb moved to open the text message with a calm that she didn’t necessarily feel.  Their plan seemed to be working for the moment and all of Emily’s considerable focus was on that fact.

_The mission is clear. Their blood will be on their own heads._

“Leviticus,” Reid’s spoke as soon as Emily had finished reading the message.  “The second part of the message is from Leviticus.  The first part is, obviously, just a statement of what he considers fact.”

Emily heard the words the Reid spoke but she didn’t need them.  She knew where that particular quote came from, it was the bread and butter for anti-gay Christians, never mind that Leviticus also cautioned against wearing mixed fibers and eating shrimp and allowed you to stone your wife or sell your daughter.  Emily felt a small but familiar knot form in her stomach it was a combination of sadness and rage at a world that seemed designed to breed hate and fear.  She could feel JJ’s eyes on her but didn’t give in to the call to look into those blue eyes, there was too much at risk and she had too little control.  Luckily for her the moment was broken by Hotch’s voice.  He sounded urgent and hopeful and allowed Emily to focus not on herself but on the case before them.

“Garcia,” Hotch was focused on the computer, “are you getting any closer.” 

“I’ve worked through most of the fog this guy’s been keeping around himself.”  The satisfaction in her voice was clear to everyone in the room.  “Whatever dime store piece of technology he’s using is keeping me from pinpointing his position but I’ve narrowed it down to a six-block radius centered on the 700 block of North East Davis. It’s not perfect but it is closer.  And before you ask boss I’ll have a list of any properties linked to anyone in this case in five minutes.”

“Good work Garcia,” Hotch finally took his attention away from the screen and looked up.  “JJ, I need you to arrange a press conference for later this afternoon.  Assuming we haven’t found him by then we will need to draw him out of the woodwork.”

It took the briefest moment for JJ to force herself to be fully present.  She couldn’t completely remove the tiny spot of fear that settled near her heart whenever Emily’s phone indicated another text message.  She was fully aware the unsub was in some distant part of the city but that did nothing to change the simple fact she hated that the other woman was in this position.  She found herself watching the subtle play of emotions on Emily’s face, brief nuanced expressions that others would surely miss but that flashed like a beacon to JJ.  

She could see frustration and anger in the tightening of dark lips and the slightest flush in pale cheeks.  There was no doubt in JJ’s mind that Emily shared her internal struggle with this case and she briefly, irrationally, wished that they could just hold each other and make the rest of the world disappear.  Instead she turned her gaze to Hotch and took in the details of his request for a press conference.  If they couldn’t find him they would bring him out.  If he thought his mission was so clear the best way to force his hand would be to make sure they got it wrong.

Having already established that this unsub had no fear about contacting the authorities made it easier to reach out to him through the media.  JJ had used the trick before, the tactic of subtly or not so subtly misrepresenting the details of the crime or their suspect in order to elicit a response from an unsub.  There was no doubt it could be a dangerous game sometimes backfiring and causing harm but it was a calculated risk that the team and the police were sometimes willing to take.  If Garcia’s search didn’t turn up any solid leads JJ would present a theory of the crime to the press, this theory would be that they suspected local hate groups were behind the killings.  Just as Hotch finished his explanation the computer on the table once again beeped to life and Garcia’s voice came through clearly.   

“I may have hit the jackpot,” excitement was clear in her voice, “I found a property owned by Living Water Church.  It is a small apartment building well within the area the signal was coming from and, perhaps most importantly, apartment 2-C is rented to one Andrew Hutchins.”

“Morgan,” Hotch responded immediately, “you and Prentiss see if Mr. Hutchins is home and if he will choose to be slightly more forthcoming this time.”


	23. Chapter 23

Morgan drove them to Andrew Hutchins apartment following the directions Garcia had sent.  As they traveled he tried to fill her in on his observations from his early meeting with the young man.

“He definitely didn’t like us,” Morgan noted, “he was protective of the church and of Michaels.”

“Did he seem capable of executing these murders though,” Emily asked the obvious question.

“Honestly,” he responded, “no. He seemed too young, too short a fuse. There was a definite vibe that he would have gone off if we’d tried to push it with Pastor John.  He didn’t strike me as steady enough and certainly not meticulous enough to be our guy.”

“Do you think we’ll find anything?”  Emily wasn’t certain from what Morgan had said if he thought this was a wild goose chase or not.  In the end, she wasn’t even sure what she thought at this point.  The two days of this case seemed considerably longer, she couldn’t tell if it was the general tail chasing they had been doing or that the rest of her life had flipped upside down over night.  Either way, she was tired and ready for something in the case to break.

“I hope so,” Emily could hear a note of resignation in Morgan’s voice that reflected her own feelings.  “I’m about ready to find this guy.”

Emily nodded in agreement.  She felt the desire for this case to be over almost physically.  Each dead end seemed to add a weight to her shoulders making her at turns frustrated, sad, and angry.  There were days the job was considerably more difficult than others and this day, this case, was a shining example of the personal challenges that came as part and parcel to being a member of the BAU.   

Silence settled between Emily and Morgan as they continued their drive.  They were both thoughtful and stoic at equal turns and neither saw the need to push the other for conversation at this point.  The soft voice of the GPS directed them to their destination in an unobtrusive fashion and Morgan made the last few turns until they arrived at the building housing young Mr. Hutchins.  They exited the SUV in silence moving as a well-practiced unit toward the door, cautious without drawing undo attention or creating more of a forceful presence than was absolutely necessary.

Neither agent was certain that the resident of the apartment would be home.  It was entirely possible that he had left the church shortly after Morgan and Rossi had made their exit and he would have had ample time to make it back here while the BAU team had been gathering information at the station.  There was also the chance that he was still at the church weeding the gardens and no one was home, or, as both Morgan and Prentiss hoped, his friend Gregory Michaels was hiding out in this small apartment.  

As they approached the door it became evident that none of these things was entirely representative of the situation.  As they approached apartment 2C Emily’s eye was quickly drawn to the gap between the door and the frame, clear evidence that it had been left open.  The dark-haired agent quickly motioned to the door drawing Morgan’s attention to it and indicating that they should proceed with caution.  

Morgan took the lead pushing open the door and announcing their presence in his most authoritative tone, no response was forthcoming from the interior of the apartment but the now wide-open door did reveal obvious signs of a struggle.  The small living space was in a shambles one lamp had been overturned and broken the couch cushions were in disarray and there seemed to be blood in the neutral colored carpet.

Morgan veered off toward the kitchen with his weapon drawn to clear the room while Emily moved to the left entering the small bedroom.  As she entered the dimly lit space she saw a young man with bright red hair huddled on the floor by the bed with his face in his hands and blood leaking slowly between his fingers.

“Andrew Hutchins?”  Emily spoke clearly and directly though she was fairly certain she already knew who the young man was, “my name is Emily Prentiss.  I’m with the FBI.  Are you alright?”

Her words were met by fearful eyes looking up at her from the floor, one of which was rapidly swelling.  He nodded after a moment and tried to stand only to fall back to his knees in the attempt.

“Morgan,” Emily’s voice was loud and stern as she called out to her colleague, “Hutchins is in here and he’s been beaten pretty badly.”  As soon as she finished speaking she grabbed her phone and proceeded to call 911 requesting an ambulance to their current location.  With that call completed she holstered her weapon and knelt down to try and talk to the young man in front of her.  Morgan entered the room seconds later and quickly got out his own phone to alert Hotch and the rest of the team to the situation.

“Can you speak,” Emily’s tone gentled considerably as she focused on Hutchins, “I’m here to help you.  I just want to know if you are alright.”

He slowly took his hands away from his face revealing an obviously broken nose and multiple bruises on his face.  He was disoriented and unable to stand without help.  Emily thought it best to allow him to remain sitting on the floor as she couldn’t make out the full extent of his injuries.  He nodded slowly indicating that he had the ability to communicate but was clearly in pain.

“Do you know who did this to you,” Emily asked hoping to get answers that would help them as well as the young red head in front of her.

He nodded again slowly trying to form words through blood and swollen lips.  Emily winced at the sight feeling a great deal of empathy for the effort it must be taking for him to stay conscious at alert enough to answer her questions.

“Greg,” the word came out slightly muddled but clear enough for Emily to understand.

“Gregory Michaels?”  Emily knew there was a sense of urgency in her voice that she would normally have tried to keep in check but this situation was not lending itself to her typical detached demeanor.  

Again, there was a brief nod before Hutchins eyes began to drift closed fluttering with a brief loss of consciousness.  Emily grabbed a blanket from the bed and put it over the young man to keep him warm and comfortable until the ambulance arrived knowing there was little else they could do for him.  She continued to kneel next to him not wanting to take her attention away in case his condition worsened.  As she settled in next to him she felt his hand grip her forearm she looked down at his fingers sticky with blood from his face and felt a mixture of unidentifiable emotions rise in her chest.

Morgan turned back into the room returning his phone to his belt having concluded his conversation with Hotch.  He looked down at Emily concern etched on his features as he saw the way Hutchins gripped her arm and could read a rare moment of emotion on those porcelain features.  He seemed about to speak when the sirens of the ambulance sounded in the parking lot and he turned to direct the EMTs to the victim. 

Emily stepped away from the battered young man on the ground to make room for the EMTs to do their job. With quick efficiency they loaded him onto the gurney and began to wheel him out of the room. Emily couldn’t seem to take her eyes off his swollen bloody face feeling the cold fire of rage in her chest. She was a profiler after all and had watched the video of the Living Water church service and had seen the look on his face when he looked at Gregory Michaels. She knew what she had seen, and she knew that this kid had been led to hate himself so much that he joined that church. And she knew that Michaels had met that self-loathing with a loathing of his own. 

As the gurney passed her his good eye fluttered open and she looked at him and saw so much pain. All she could think was that no one should ever have to feel that. None of them should ever have to harbor the kind of shame that so many expected of them. She hoped he would be ok. She hoped he would find peace and maybe one day…love. And right now she needed to find the man who was responsible for this and four senseless deaths. She needed him off the streets. She needed justice. And she needed JJ.

“Michaels can’t be that far ahead of us,” Morgan’s voice startled Emily out of her thoughts though she covered it well.

“No,” Emily let just a touch of the frustration she felt bleed into her words, “but he’s just far enough that we still don’t know where he is.”

Seemingly on cue Emily’s phone beeped alerting her to a text

_The sin of your sister city of Sodom_

Emily didn’t need Reid’s knowledge of the Bible to know the meaning of this text. As she stared at her phone Morgan’s rang.

“What have you got for us Baby Girl?” He knew it was Garcia calling about tracking the signal.

“He is within a six-block radius of the Living Water Church.” Garcia’s voice stated succinctly over the speaker.

Before the sentence was complete Emily was headed to the SUV keys already in her hand. Morgan ran to catch up realizing now would not be the time to offer to drive. He wouldn’t be much of a profiler if he couldn’t see there was something going on with his friend. Prentiss was never one to lose her cool. He had seen her stare down the barrel of a gun more than once and leave the scene without so much as a hair out of place. This case had gotten under her skin and he was pretty sure he knew why but also didn’t want to pry into the life that she kept meticulously private.


	24. Chapter 24

The rest of the team pulled up to the church just moments after Prentiss and Morgan. There was little doubt that Gregory Michaels was inside. Garcia may not have been able to narrow down his precise location but this was the only one that made sense. They gathered for a moment Reid and Morgan silently agreeing to take the side door to the left, Hotch and Rossi to the right leaving JJ and Emily to enter through the front the door that had been left open slightly. They looked at each other for the briefest second both knowing they couldn’t waste time on the turmoil boiling inside. They had a job to do and it was time to finish this.

Approaching the open door, they could see into the church. The lights were dim but they could see a non-descript, sandy haired, young man kneeling before the cross at the front of the room. His hands were raised in penitence or prayer. Emily could just barely make out the bloody bruised knuckles and she felt that spark of rage flair in her chest again. He had taken so much with those hands. He had punished his sister for living her truth. He had taken a young couple’s dreams of the future. Images of sitting in the living room of the heartbroken Jessie Aldridge as she cried at the loss of her love flashed in Emily’s mind.

JJ could almost feel Emily’s anger like a palpable force in the air and she shared it. This case had eaten at her heart from the moment the file landed on her desk. This unsub was the personification of her worst fears. This was the very real threat that she’d always felt lurking in the disapproval of her small town, this was the thing her mother had feared most. When JJ first told her Mom that she thought she might like girls her Mom had hugged her close and said she never wanted anyone to hurt her. This is what her mother meant. 

“Gregory Michaels,” Emily’s voice was clear in the empty room, slightly echoing with the acoustics. 

“The blood will be on their heads, Agent Prentiss.” His voice was as calm as it had been in his apartment. No rage, just conviction. “Young Andrew might yet be saved. Perhaps I won’t have failed him.”

“You beat him nearly to death Greg,” Emily stated this clearly as she continued to approach him. 

“The sin of Sodom will be punished by God,” Michaels continued, “he spoke of his dark desires and sought to be free of them. I only wished to free him through Gods wrath. I only wished to free them all. I prayed with them. I offered them to confess their sins and be cleansed. I bade the darkness to leave them. I tried so hard. But they would not turn from the darkness. I had no other recourse, Agent Prentiss. Their darkness must not be allowed to flourish.” 

He didn’t move as he spoke. His arms raised palms open before the cross. The words came from him with such conviction and fire it made Emily’s skin crawl. The worst thing was she knew he meant what he said. She had heard about as much of this as she could take. She slipped the cuffs from her belt and slapped them around one raised wrist bringing his arms down behind his back and securing them together. No more prayers for him tonight. 

She pulled him up and walked him out the front doors of the church the rest of the team following a few steps behind. Emily wanted this to be finished. She wanted to hand him off to the nearest Portland PD officer and know that he was never going to see freedom again. And she did just that resisting the urge to wipe her hands on her jacket after she let him go. 

Once she was free of his presence she felt something lift within her. They had done it. JJ’s promise to a grieving widow had been kept, they got the guy. No sooner had that thought processed then she realized there were other promises that could now be kept. It was such an incongruous feeling. There were squad cars all around with lights flashing, this case had been deeply disturbing and personal, but it was also a catalyst for potentially the best thing that had ever happened to Emily Prentiss. 

With that thought the world around her came into sharper focus and she saw JJ standing just a few feet away squaring away some last details with a couple of reporters. In a couple of hours they’d be back on the jet to Quantico this case filed and closed. JJ turned away from the reporters and her blue eyes met with Emily’s and spoke volumes in that brief contact. It was going to be a long flight for both of them.

Emily made her way slowly back to her SUV feeling the need to just sit and think. The tangle of emotions in her chest was almost too much for her. She had grown so accustomed to her tidy compartments she wasn’t at all sure what to do with the fact that her brain felt like someone had run through and dumped every drawer into the middle of the room. She slid into the driver’s seat and let her head fall back against the head rest.

Her eyes drifted closed and she let out a long breath trying to release some of the roiling emotions from her chest. She sat, keys in hand not ready to start the car but also not at all sure what she wanted to do. There were loose ends to tie up back at the station, reports to file with local police, and probably at least one more interview with Michaels to see what details he was willing to give. His little performance there in the church was as much confession as anything but they would still need to make sure the case would stick good and solid. 

As she sat, eyes still closed, she could hear the sounds from outside the car. Patrol cars starting and pulling away, voices both strange and familiar, the world continuing to move. Emily picked a familiar set of footsteps approaching and heard the click of the passenger side door opening. She didn’t move, didn’t open her eyes that all seemed too difficult in the moment. There was the rustle of clothes against the seat and the shifting of weight and then Emily felt the keys she’d been holding loosely in her right hand lifted and replaced by warm familiar fingers. The silence wasn’t broken by words just a lacing of fingers together and firm pressure, solid and reassuring.

JJ sat quietly looking at Emily. Her dark eyes were closed, her jaw tense. Her hand held the blonde’s firmly but that was the only acknowledgment of her presence. The silence stretched but not uncomfortably. JJ just continued to take the opportunity to observe watching as the lines of tension slowly disappeared from Emily’s face as though she was mentally packing away one emotion after another. Tidying herself from the inside out. There was a slight tightening of the grip on her hand and soon JJ watched as Emily lifted their joined hands and brushed her lips softly over knuckles. 

With that Emily opened her eyes and looked across the car to the blonde in the other seat. “Thank you.” 

“For what?” JJ asked softly.

“For just being there,” Emily responded, “for just being you.”

JJ smiled softly at that and shrugged, “wouldn’t want to be anywhere or anyone else.”

“There is one thing I need though,” Emily let a tired grin touch her lips.

“What?” JJ asked genuinely curious. 

“The keys,” Emily answered actually feeling the humor. “I can’t get us back to the station without them.”

JJ let out a light chuckle realizing she’d expected something else entirely but handed Emily the keys and let go of her hand. Her hand felt empty without those thin, graceful fingers entwined with hers. She’d been acting mostly on instinct when she’d walked over to the SUV and invited herself in. She’d had a brief talk with Morgan after she’d finished up with the reporters and he had not so subtly pointed to where Emily had gone and mentioned how shaken she’d seemed after they found Hutchins beaten so badly at the apartment.

She was glad her instincts were correct and that Emily had welcomed her presence. 

“This case sure went from 0 to 60 today.” JJ ventured wanting to get Emily to open up a bit about what she was feeling.

“Yeah,” Emily agreed. They’d gone from spinning their wheels to grabbing up the unsub on the turn of just a couple of clues. Their work was like that, a whole lot of nothing right up until there was something. “At least we won’t have to worry about a confession. He doesn’t seem to have the slightest bit of shame for what he’s done.” Emily’s words were colored just a bit by the anger she still felt.

“No, he sure doesn’t.” JJ agreed quietly. That was really the heart of it. He thought he was entirely right to hate them. Not just hating his sister or the other women he’d killed or the young man he’d beaten. He hated them just for existing. And he wasn’t alone. No, most people weren’t going to kill them but plenty hated them. 

The trick was to stop letting that be the thing that dictated action. JJ had, for most of her life, thought that she could protect herself if she just didn’t open up. If she kept relationships private and at a distance the world wouldn’t hurt her the way her mother feared it would. She also realized she’d learned something very important in the last two days. The cost of living with that fear was too high. She’d rather die loving Emily than live without her.

“Hey, Emily,” JJ kept her eyes forward watching the road.

“Yes, JJ,” Emily cast a quick glance over at the blonde.

“Can we go back to your place when we get home? I really like the view from your living room.” JJ felt the blush in her cheeks and she knew she’d pushed the words out rather quickly before she got awkward and lost her nerve. “And I don’t want to waste any more time than we already have.”

Emily was so surprised by the words she couldn’t hide the smile that broke across her face. This was really happening. The emotional roller coaster of the last two days, hell the last two years, was finally coming to this place and Emily knew she’d be a fool to let this go. All the years of lessons about shielding her heart and the lectures from her mother about propriety disappeared in the wake of the rush of emotions she felt at the idea of going home with JJ, of being with JJ.

“Yes, yes we can.” Emily answered simply as they pulled into the station to take care of the last responsibilities before flying home. 

_“There are plenty of good reasons for fighting," I said, "but no good reason ever to hate without reservation, to imagine that God Almighty Himself hates with you, too. Where's evil? It's that large part of every man that wants to hate without limit that wants to hate with God on its side.”_

_-Kurt Vonnegut_


	25. Epilogue

The view from Emily’s condo really was breathtaking. JJ hadn’t been kidding when she said she liked it. She also knew that she wanted to unravel the mystery that is Emily Prentiss and what better place to start. She stood looking out over the lights of DC marveling at everything that had changed between them. Changed probably wasn’t the right word. No, not changed, acknowledged, embraced, maybe were more accurate. 

Emily watched JJ standing in her window silhouetted by the city lights and wondered what she was thinking about. She also wondered how this had happened. They’d left on a case with years of unspoken distance between them and no end to that chasm in sight and they had come home to this feeling of possibility, potential. This feeling that they had finally come home to each other in the most unexpected of circumstances. She took a step closer to JJ wanting to bridge that last lingering distance that had seemed so insurmountable a few days ago.

“Penny for ‘em,” came a soft voice from just behind JJ. The blonde turned her back on the view to find a pair of dark sparkling eyes. The view had nothing on those eyes. JJ felt herself flush at their proximity. Memories of their first kisses played in her mind’s eye and she decided to answer the question with action rather than words. 

JJ lifted herself up on her tip toes making up for the difference in their heights and pressed her lips softly to Emily’s perfect red ones. She didn’t rush, or push, just a soft needful exploration. A kiss that spoke of all the time in the world. She felt hands on her hips and then sliding around to her back to bring their bodies close together. Emily’s tongue brushed lightly over JJ’s bottom lip asking, inviting, and JJ parted her lips in response. 

The exploration deepened and JJ reached up running her fingers through silky dark hair. She could feel their kisses through her entire body, lightning flashes and low burning settling in and aching. 

Emily drank in the sweetness of JJ’s mouth and let her hands begin to explore sliding under the light fabric of her shirt up the warm, golden skin of her back. She could feel the toned muscles flexing under soft skin as she brushed her fingers from waist to shoulders. She wanted more, she wanted everything. 

With no small amount of effort Emily pulled back looking directly into blue eyes darkened almost to indigo with unfiltered desire. The look in those eyes nearly undid Emily Prentiss. She had her share of lovers over the years but not one of them had ever looked at her like JJ was right now. She’d known that what was between them was different. What she hadn’t known was how badly she needed what was being offered. She knew that her life wouldn’t be the same after tonight. Her compartments were about to be destroyed by those blue eyes.

JJ knew, with unwavering certainty, that she had never wanted anyone the way she wanted Emily. She knew her heart was on the line in a way she’d never let it be before. She knew there were thoughts going on behind those dark eyes and she had the briefest spark of fear that cool, collected Emily Prentiss would realize what a risk this all was and pull back. JJ was certain her heart would stop if that happened. She searched those gorgeous dark eyes letting everything she felt, everything she needed show on her face, praying it was enough.

Emily kept looking into JJ’s eyes, felt the call in their depths and did the only thing she could think to do. She gave in, that last bit of doubt she may have had. Anything that tickled the back of her mind warning her against this was silenced by the fire in those eyes and the loud beating of her own heart. She reached out, taking the hem of JJ’s shirt in her hands and lifted it over the blonde’s head. JJ obligingly lifted her arms feeling the cool air on her skin as Emily absently let the other woman’s shirt fall to the floor. JJ reached out returning the favor unbuttoning Emily’s shirt and pushing it back off her shoulders and down her arms letting it pool on the floor around her feet.

Hands began to explore bare flesh, tracing patterns learning hollows, convex and concave that elicited soft shivers and whimpers of need. Neither of them were certain when the rest of their clothes ended up on the floor. It happened as a matter of course when lips met with impediments to exploration and tasting until they were bare before each other. 

Emily stood looking at JJ, taking in the sun-kissed skin and athletic limbs. God damn it, she was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen. She smiled wickedly and put her hands just under the curve of perfect backside lifting up. JJ once again cooperated throwing her legs around Emily’s waist and her arms around her shoulders. Emily took advantage of this new position pressing her lips to JJ’s neck kissing pathways from shoulder to ear. Hands gripping tightly keeping JJ pressed against her.

“Jennifer,” Emily’s voice purred in JJ’s ear again reminding the blonde that her far too average name transformed completely when it passed Emily’s lips. “Let’s go to bed.”

“Yes, please,” JJ responded. 

It was a short trip to Emily’s bedroom and JJ soon felt herself being lowered onto the bed torn between the comfort of it and the loss of skin on skin as Emily stood looking at her appraisingly. Emily’s dark eyes had gone unfathomably darker and JJ longed to lose herself in them. The blonde reached her hand up in invitation, it was accepted and Emily stretched her long body over JJ’s once again exploring her lips igniting a need within them both that had been denied for too long.

Emily let her hands glide over JJ’s body, her fingers urgent against willing flesh. She watched JJ’s face intently for responses to different touches, new discoveries of what made her eyes want to close or widen, what made moans slip passed her lips. Her hand worked its way down the slight curve of stomach brushing against blonde curls and JJ’s eyes opened and her hips jerked up.

JJ’s eyes met Emily’s and locked with them. She could feel want and need raging through her body and those dark eyes acted like an anchor keeping her in the moment. She wanted those fingers just a bit lower, she wanted Emily inside of her. She’d wanted it for so long and the reality of it was so much more than her fantasies could have imagined. 

Emily could see the plea in JJ’s eyes and she answered it. Her fingers drifted lower slipping through warm wet heat. She watched blue eyes change as her fingers entered JJ. The circuit completed, Emily slid her thigh between JJ’s legs adding pressure and force to the motion of her fingers. JJ braced herself against the head board with one arm never breaking the contact of their eyes pressing herself onto Emily’s fingers wanting her deeper, wanting to take all of her into her body, to melt them together. She could hear herself in some distant place, could hear the ragged moans coming from her throat as Emily matched the demanding pace of her hips. The passion built between them until neither could contain it. Their cries mingled in the hot air between them and they crashed together.

Before she was fully aware of what was happening, Emily felt JJ move beneath her and a sudden shift happened. Emily was on her back and JJ was shifting down her body. Deft fingers found their goal and Emily groaned at the sudden feeling of fullness her mind was swimming with sensation as release took her with unexpected speed and force. It was all Emily could do to wrap her arms around the compact blonde and bring her down on top of her where they shivered through the aftershocks together. 

Some indeterminant time later JJ lifted her head propping it on her hand so she could look down at Emily. Her other hand drew lazy patterns on Emily’s stomach.

“You were right back in Portland,” JJ mused her voice raspy and low.

“About what,” Emily asked her hand absently tucking blonde hair behind JJ’s ear and then tracing her fingertips down the curve of the other woman’s jaw. 

“One night will never be enough.”


End file.
